In attaining the grade of Master of the Temple, the Adept is drawn inexorably towards the HGA with such impact that the qliphoth/Ego that was (or seemed to be) the Adept falls away to the world of phenomena, devoid of life of its own, only to be inhabited by circumstance by the real Adept, the HGA, who in truth dwelleth forever in the Openess of Our Lady Babalon, The Great, The Great... The Babe of the Abyss is the dissonance between the shell (more accurately, the old habits or patterns of the renounced/detattched cognitive faculties; see here) and the Adept. I digress. But indeed, where is there then for self-pity to build a nest in the tree without leaves nor branches nor trunk nor roots?

"He that lives long & desires death much is ever the King among the Kings."

The death longed after is revelry in the Night of Pan. However, dissolution is not the formula of the Magus, hence the cursed aspect of that grade. The Magus must re-assimilate with concept of self, and with transience, and with sorrow; their formula involves the Coagula, reconstitution, which inevitably must follow any utterly successful spiritual completion of Solve, the process of dissolving. Further, their formula involves becoming always a mouthpiece for Transmission.

The task of the Magus can be summed up thus. The Magus is as upon a stage giving a presentation, and they only want people to focus on that presentation. And yet the whole time they are painfully aware that their own presence will serve as nothing but a distraction to the presentation. Therefore: "How shall He destroy Himself?"

It's an action or a function of the way that the mind works, it is not a belief.

"If the body of the King dissolve, he shall remain in pure ecstasy for ever."

"Farther and farther we float; yet we are still. It is the chain of systems that is falling away from us. First falls the silly world; the world of the old grey land. Falls it unthinkably far, with its sorrowful bearded face presiding over it; it fades to silence and woe. We to silence and bliss, and the face is the laughing face of Eros."

Just take that restictor plate called Ego off of the intake of the mind.

"For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect."

Thy feet in mire, thine head in murk,
O man, how piteous thy plight,
The doubts that daunt, the ills that irk,
Thou hast nor wit nor will to fight—
How hope in heart, or worth in work?
No star in sight!

Thy gods proved puppets of the priest.
“Truth? All’s relation!” science sighed.
In bondage with thy brother beast,
Love tortured thee, as Love’s hope died
And Lover’s faith rotted. Life no least
Dim star descried.

Thy cringing carrion cowered and crawled
To find itself a chance-cast clod
Whose Pain was purposeless; appalled
That aimless accident thus trod
Its agony, that void skies sprawled
On the vain sod!

I have of late, (but wherefore I know not) lost all my mirth, forgone all custom of exercises; and indeed, it goes so heavily with my disposition; that this goodly frame the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory; this most excellent canopy the air, look you, this brave o'er hanging firmament, this majestical roof, fretted with golden fire: why, it appeareth no other thing to me, than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours. What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason, how infinite in faculty! In form and moving how express and admirable! In action how like an Angel! in apprehension how like a god! The beauty of the world! The paragon of animals!** And yet to me, what is this quintessence of dust? Man delights not me; no, nor Woman neither **'

I think these two sum up my Trance of Sorrow - and Shakespeare's - and Crowley's. I think it's self explanitory.
And yes, my resolve to become a master was at the deepest point possible of this trance and still be alive.
Damn harsh shove to get on the path - but if you've ignored every other guiding tug I guess it's warranted.

"Of course, one then remembers (at once or eventually) the key of humor: "It ain't funny if it ain't real - and it ain't real if it ain't funny.""

Thank you again for this quote, Jim. I should get it framed.

"Yesterday (October 6, 2015 12:26pm EST) I wrote: "The view of attainment or enlightenment of the 'I' is also vastly amiss!"

From my Record for today (October 7, 2015):
This (my entry from above) is, I believe, the perception of one of the deeper layers of the Trance of Sorrow.

All this work, all of these shifts in perspective are tools. They will not bring this "I", they will not bring Jeremy, to any permanence. All, from the standpoint of this Ego, is transient. Existence is sorrow. The HGA is not an extension of this self. The Impersonal Light or Consciousness is not an extension of this self. The Great Work even is not an extension of this self. These things are for you, Jeremy, to realize that the understanding of "existence is pure joy" is not, nor can not, EVER be dependent or connected to this self. This self can find peace in these things, sure, but this self is ever-ephemeral. This self, this Ego, only exists so long as the brain which formed it. Perspectives can and must change, but so long as they are in relation to this self, or any "self", they are transient.

@seekinghga said

"Not even when the lovliest of flowers bloom
Will you breathe forever."

I understand now what I meant. The fruits of my work are not for "me." No longer do I think this nor know this nor see this; it has been felt within the heart of my heart, which is also transient: Everything is Sorrow. So it is. Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law."

Wow, beautiful stuff, man!

**Success is your proof; courage is your armour; go on, go on, in my strength; & ye shall turn not back for any!
** AL III:46

From my Record for today (October 7, 2015):
This (my entry from above) is, I believe, the perception of one of the deeper layers of the Trance of Sorrow.

All this work, all of these shifts in perspective are tools. They will not bring this "I", they will not bring Jeremy, to any permanence. All, from the standpoint of this Ego, is transient. Existence is sorrow. The HGA is not an extension of this self. The Impersonal Light or Consciousness is not an extension of this self. The Great Work even is not an extension of this self. These things are for you, Jeremy, to realize that the understanding of "existence is pure joy" is not, nor can not, EVER be dependent or connected to this self. This self can find peace in these things, sure, but this self is ever-ephemeral. This self, this Ego, only exists so long as the brain which formed it. Perspectives can and must change, but so long as they are in relation to this self, or any "self", they are transient.

@seekinghga said

"Not even when the lovliest of flowers bloom
Will you breathe forever."

I understand now what I meant. The fruits of my work are not for "me." No longer do I think this nor know this nor see this; it has been felt within the heart of my heart, which is also transient: Everything is Sorrow. So it is. Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

www.hulu.com/watch/731202

I haven't done it personally but I think your emendations probably changed the nature of the practice. I get the sense Liber HHH is actually about experiencing the death of your physical body rather than the emotions associated with death generally.

However, your emendations do seem like a good path towards experiencing the Trance of Sorrow.

"I don't know if I have truly experienced it yet, but I have a bit to say on a feeling which I could characterize with this name.
Ever since I seriously picked up the Great Work, I have more and more often been overcome by a strong feeling of longing (towards my HGA, or the Supernals - I am not able to tell yet), which makes everything else besides the Work irrelevant for me.
It does feel like sorrow, and I in deep regret that I didn't start the Work sooner. I think that's what it is for me, and it's a great motivator to work as hard as I can."

Same happened to me.

On another note, how does one meditate in the First Noble Truth to enter in the Trance of Sorrow? I can't recall which Liber is exactly, but in one of them they suggest you to imagine yourself dead. I took the suggestion and modified it slightly, so in my meditations my dear loved ones died, I died in front of them, separations from different kinds of pleasures, etc. My question is if this is a right approach. I think it's more a contemplation than meditation, but it's made me aware of lot of things.

I always banish before and after, of course.
So, did I do good?

"Is this supposed to be related to the feeling of loss that one feels when the things that were once valuable to him must lose their worth? Such as when making hallow the consciousness? I have read the essay on sorrow by Crowley. I am looking for contemporary points of view."

Continuing my thread-bouncing response to you...

This was actually a really good question, and a really good style. You started by stating where you were coming from, what thoughts you had, giving an inference of where the question was coming from so that people could actually engage meaingfully rather than taking a buckshot approach.

"Astrologer Jayj Jacobs in the 1970s. Consistent with Jayj's wishes, I've totally stolen it ever sense

(Because it's true! Funny, eh?)"

: )

Love is the law, love under will.

(Because it's true! Funny, eh?)

"
Of course, one then remembers (at once or eventually) the key of humor: "It ain't funny if it ain't real - and it ain't real if it ain't funny.""

Jim, where is that quote from, if I may be so serious as to ask?

"To lock yourself away from the world, that is to say that "the world is transient and so there is no point in accepting or participating," (a form of what Crowley says, "willed dissociation") these are thoughts of the Black Brothers. As is the idea of saying that "they are fools for they cherish Maya and they are not worthy of me or my thought. I am a high-minded yogi or magician. I am 'here' and they are 'there'. They do not, can not, hold a candle to me." That is all pride-filled rubbish; the apotheosis of the transient Ego-consciousness. One must assimilate ALL of it--the "good" and the "bad," the internal and the external, the subjective and objective. Otherwise the Ego can not be held in check, it will be free to expand in its own world without an external "reality" with which to gauge and confine its growth.

"(The state of mind which is characterised by Indifference is commonly called Trance, but the misnomer is unfortunate. It is, in fact, in a sense the precise contrary of a Trance; for Trance usually implies Samadhi, and this state specifically excludes any such occurrence.) That implies a uniting, and this a willed dissociation. Yet there is nothing here to suggest necessarily any practice of the Black Brothers; for it is not, properly speaking, an Attainment, but rather a convenient attitude."

• LETT, Indifference"

Nice.

93 93/93

"
"You look at other people who are running to gather money, or buying things for their children's future, or seeking to become the next big rock band, or are planning "the rest of their lives" with a spouse, or are buying the best car, or are worshiping the biggest god, and yet they don't realize the futility of it."

That's your judgement, futility. You are projecting your values on to others. To "them" it may not be futile. Their way of thinking may give it meaning. What do you value? Learning, perhaps? "

No - I mean 'futile' in the sense of 'grasping at impermanent things as if they were permanent'... in the sense that attachment to material things inevitably brings suffering

"Be careful with these thoughts, you must confront it with its opposite. Indeed, from a certain perspective, is not all the universe just the play of consciousness? Whether it manifests itself in the "play" of atoms or elements in space, or the of the play of puppies, children, or man-children? What you ultimately strive for is beyond this dualistic notion."

How is striving beyond dualism?

"Remember to seek psychic balance and harmony. If you get too melancholic, it will hinder your progress and dampen your inner light."

No ones melancholic - its the old 'Im a realist, not a pessimist!'

93 93/93

In the Hogakure a reference is made to the will of a samurai after his head has been cut off. He should still be able to perform One action after decapitation. Slaying the enemy with one cut for instance. Such should be his Will.
Sick people will sacrifice themselves and/or commit to suprahuman endeavours especially if they have a timeline. Or confront a disease or injury with Will to live.
Trance of Sorrow may come to ordinary people As a Banner of the Chariot. Something glimpsed before its time to Act, like waking up from A nightmare to save your family from the burning house.
Of course, I could be wrong.

"(The state of mind which is characterised by Indifference is commonly called Trance, but the misnomer is unfortunate. It is, in fact, in a sense the precise contrary of a Trance; for Trance usually implies Samadhi, and this state specifically excludes any such occurrence.) That implies a uniting, and this a willed dissociation. Yet there is nothing here to suggest necessarily any practice of the Black Brothers; for it is not, properly speaking, an Attainment, but rather a convenient attitude."

• LETT, Indifference

"You look at other people who are running to gather money, or buying things for their children's future, or seeking to become the next big rock band, or are planning "the rest of their lives" with a spouse, or are buying the best car, or are worshiping the biggest god, and yet they don't realize the futility of it."

That's your judgement, futility. You are projecting your values on to others. To "them" it may not be futile. Their way of thinking may give it meaning. What do you value? Learning, perhaps?

Be careful with these thoughts, you must confront it with its opposite. Indeed, from a certain perspective, is not all the universe just the play of consciousness? Whether it manifests itself in the "play" of atoms or elements in space, or the of the play of puppies, children, or man-children? What you ultimately strive for is beyond this dualistic notion.

Remember to seek psychic balance and harmony. If you get too melancholic, it will hinder your progress and dampen your inner light.

"Sure. Why do you think the Buddha is laughing?"

Book of Lies chapter 14:

Kappa-Epsilon-Phi-Alpha-Lambda-Eta Iota-Delta
ONION-PEELINGS

The Universe is the Practical Joke of the General at the Expense of the Particular, quoth FRATER PERDURABO, and laughed.
But those disciples nearest to him wept, seeing the Universal Sorrow.
Those next to them laughed, seeing the Universal Joke.
Below these certain disciples wept.
Then certain laughed.
Others next wept.
Others next laughed.
Next others wept.
Next others laughed.
Last came those that wept because they could not see the Joke, and those that laughed lest they should be thought not to see the Joke, and thought it safe to act like FRATER PERDURABO.
But though FRATER PERDURABO laughed openly, He also at the same time wept secretly; and in Himself He neither laughed nor wept.
Nor did He mean what He said.