"Welcome indeed! I had a somewhat similar uptake, with the Crow just popping up willy nilly all over the damn place, culminating in me stumbling across the Book of the Law under auspicious circumstances. Almost a cliché! That sense of being drawn in... When it's time it's time, y'know? I suppose that's how I had to look at it at least. That was two years ago, I was 16. No amount of ranting can explain how intense those first two years were, especially so on an adolescent brain, and now at 18 I find myself a Probationer of A.'.A.'. -- This stuff's no bullshit!

So yeah, best of luck on your travels, Ms. SteampunkRabbit. You seem a grounded and creative soul. "

Thank you very much

So yeah, best of luck on your travels, Ms. SteampunkRabbit. You seem a grounded and creative soul.

"

"Does that make a little more sense? I know I tend to have an incoherent speech, but I try to make as much sense as possible."

You did fine. "

And thanks for making me feel welcome. Even online, my anxiety sometimes makes it difficult to say something.

"The only thing I have read (or at least began before life turn a nasty turn) is MoonChild."

What a nice synchronicity. Moonchild is the book I'm reading right now.

"I would like to read the other books but I don't have the money to purchase a copy and I don't know any locals who could lend me a copy. I know that there are some sites that basically have the "general idea" posted and if it counts, I've looked through those."

Pretty much everything (and everything you need) by Crowley is online. (Granted, some of the material is copyrighted, but that doesn't change the fact: it's there and it's meant to be there.)

"Now as far as your one question "Why Thelema?" Well, I suppose that all falls back on when I found my copy of MoonChild.

(...)

Then as I had stated, earlier today, technically yesterday, it just kept coming to mind, but this time it was like someone was telling me that it'd be an answer or at least some kind of solace."

I understand. It really seems like it's calling out for you.

"Does that make a little more sense? I know I tend to have an incoherent speech, but I try to make as much sense as possible."

You did fine.

"
But, focusing on you, have you read the Book of the Law yet? Or anything else related to it?"

The only thing I have read (or at least began before life turn a nasty turn) is MoonChild. When I was doing a little bit or research earlier today, I saw that was on the list of recommended reading or at least on that site it was. I would like to read the other books but I don't have the money to purchase a copy and I don't know any locals who could lend me a copy. I know that there are some sites that basically have the "general idea" posted and if it counts, I've looked through those.

Now as far as your one question "Why Thelema?" Well, I suppose that all falls back on when I found my copy of MoonChild. I was in high school then, so I guess maybe six years ago. This book was just sitting in the garbage since it was an unwanted book from the garage sale that was occurring the previous day. Despite having no idea what the book was about, I took it out of the trash and took it home with me.

I don't exactly remember much of what happened around that time since I was on a lot of medication at the time and the combination caused my memory to not be as good as it should be for someone my age.

Anyway, I vaguely remember picking up the book and beginning to read but then something would distract me and I'd forget for awhile.

I do remember looking at the name Aleister Crowley on the book and noticing how it really stuck out like it was waving at me.

So many years later, I remember seriously sitting down with the book and reading. I believe I was also showing interest in Lovecraft at the time too, but I remember coming across Crowley's name when researching Lovecraft and once again, his name just stuck out at me.

As a fan of Venture Bros, I also noticed that in a few episodes, he made a cameo appearance and I remember thinking that he's everywhere.

Again, my memory is screwy, so there's a lot a blank spots between events. Anyway, I'd say maybe roughly three months ago, that's when I found myself, more or less, being called. I had seen these really cool looking door signs. One was the Unicursal Hexagram and the other was Seal of Babalon. Being curious, I looked up what those were. Of course, there was the connection. Then I found myself drawing a character who wears a Seal of Babalon pendant around her neck. I had felt inspired by Babalon herself and felt that placing her seal on this character of mine worked out perfectly, like a light had just went on in my head.

Then as I had stated, earlier today, technically yesterday, it just kept coming to mind, but this time it was like someone was telling me that it'd be an answer or at least some kind of solace.

Does that make a little more sense? I know I tend to have an incoherent speech, but I try to make as much sense as possible.

Hello there. I hope you get what you seek or, at least, learn useful things here. Welcome.

"I am not a Thelemite, but I am considering becoming one."

Why Thelema? (I'm not asking just out of curiosity; it's an important question for yourself. )

"Anyway, I have always just listed myself as spiritual and just went with that. I always felt like the oddball with no where to belong to, or so to speak."

I can relate to that.

"I frequently work with tarot and lately during my readings, I keep being told that I need to explore my spiritual side or open up to it. I've already been meditating on what to do, but this time I've been trying to make that matter my main focus."

Good stuff.

"Today, I feel like I had this sense of an epiphany. This voice in my head spoke and told me to look into this. I have this habit of randomly researching topics so I was already familiar with Thelema but this time I really put in effort to my research."

I asked above "Why Thelema," to make you think about it, but taking what you said into account, it's probably something worth checking in depth. Go ahead dauntlessly.

"Though, I feel it is best to speak to those who are already in it to see what I need to do and if this is truly right for me."

Many Thelemites (me, por instance) would probably say "This is truly right for everyone, a priori, they just don't know about it." (Because Thelema, as presented, says it is the true spiritual stage we are at, and someone who knows it and words with it has the upper-hand.)

But, focusing on you, have you read the Book of the Law yet? Or anything else related to it?

Love is the law, love under will.