Black brother and his fate...
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Hi x-munki,
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
Firstly, I know this thread is months old, but it is still a relevant one.
To get this thread back on the topic that you started:
@x-munki said
"Can the whole thing be brought back up somehow (to finish the job)? Can the contact be redeemed?"
I'll tell you right now: even if you have fallen into the Abyss, it is still possible to cross the Abyss successfully and attain to Understanding and Wisdom.
However it's not possible to abort and restart the crossing. You can't get ejected from the Abyss, below the supernals in order to "try again". The person in question is "in the Abyss" and they have to continue from there.
Jim Eshelman correctly referenced Crowley and the Curriculum of the A.'. A.'., to show that the A.'. A.'. curriculum and cosmology provides no avenue for getting out of the Abyss if the entry was done without one's Holy Guardian Angel. Basically; once you fail to cross the Abyss cleanly and quickly, you're "done" for this incarnation.
However, I have found that this is not the case. If a person falls in the Abyss; through will or through weakness, there is still the chance for "redemption" as it were.
I can say all of this because in 2006 I fell in the Abyss, and I found the way out.
I don't say "fell in the Abyss" flippantly; the Abyss is referred to a lot on these forums and understandably there is a lot of confusion around it. I did not merely have some weird dreams or visions, or crazy synchronicities, or become introspective and then declare that I had crossed the Abyss, or fall into a deep depression that lasted for a while or anything like that.
When I say that I fell in to the Abyss, I mean that I fell in to the Abyss. Within days of that critical juncture and my subconscious decision to fail, the dispersion of Choronzon settled on my brows. My genitals shrunk and became impotent, my mind was catapulted into the Archetypal world and began dispersing under the tremendous weight of my Karma. I would physically get knocked down backwards as if I was standing in an undertow on the shores of some ocean. Time slowed down immensely and I was stricken with insomnia. The lightning flashes of Da'ath crackled all around me. I saw what my True Will was but was completely powerless to achieve it. I saw my entire world crumbling around me and in short, I was in Hell and there was no way out.
And yet, I knew instinctively that this was not to be my end. Even in the state that I was in, I somehow knew that this was "all a part of it" for me and I became determined to not wither and die.
It became my duty to find the way out and to walk that path. This is what I have done, and I now share the way out that I found.
I have written the first volume of a book called "The Keys to Heaven", and I share this book freely with all those who have fallen in the Abyss. It is no mere theory, I have walked this path and I have turned what I have learned and experienced in to a book that can guide others out too. The book contains the bare minimum of what you need to get moving and keep moving on that path. It's not a quick fix, but it works.
So much of the path involves working things out for yourself, and having those AHA! moments. I have kept it as brief as possible and try to describe the things to do but not what to expect, so that I didn't spoil any surprises.
To support the understanding of book I've started a blog where people can ask questions and get clarification if they need.
For anyone who has fallen in the Abyss and wants it; the first volume of the book can be downloaded from my blog. The link is contained in this post (the link may be updated from time to time) - quietrespite.wordpress.com/2012/11/10/welcome-to-quiet-respite
The blog is: quietrespite.wordpress.com and I am available to all who ask for help.
Love is the law, love under will
B.'. H.'.
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@Lykathea said
"Hi Frater B:. H:.,
I've read through your book and it seems to be a perfect example of Tav phenomena. Sorry :disappointed: and I have experienced Tav phenomena a great deal in my life."I thought the same, and I've just past through Tav myself.
Don't mistake Yesod for Binah, otherwise you'll simply stop in Yesod.
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For instance:
It states in that book that in the abyss you get a sort of insight into your true will, but are unable to put it into practice. But if you were really at the threshold of the abyss you would have done this long before.
The phenomena you refer to is one of the aspects of the path of Tau, and in fact if fits closely with my own experiences of that path.
I suggest you reassess your experience, but of course you will not
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Going only by what has been quoted here, I have to agree... This sounds utterly like Tav as the threshold between Assiah and Yetzirah.
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@x-munki said
"I was wondering,
What are the general possibilities of a so-called "black brother", who, due to certain insecurities failed to cross the abyss, lost the solid contact with his HGA and fell off the path into the dead zone?
Can the whole thing be brought back up somehow (to finish the job)? Can the contact be redeemed?
Tnx"
Hey,
Totally new here (so forgive my arrogance), and this is a really old thread, but:
A black brother only knows that he or she is one AFTER the fact, they can never know beforehand or while it is happening, only after one is doomed: then one can know
The genesis of a black brother seems to be an inability to let go of conscious control of a process that does not depend on conscious control, but in fact depends on the surrendering and ripping away of conscious control (vulnerability, surrender), unconsciously
If for some reason (unconsciously, or there is some unexamined and unprepared element that has not been considered), the "fear reflex" emerges, the process is ground to a halt, and the black brother is left in a sort of "orgasm denied" state, which is called the Abyss (think blue balls)
That's basically all it is
The reason why a black brother cannot climb up until a subsequent lifetime is because: the climb is not conscious
It does not depend on personal effort, or any sort of deliberate, planned cultivation
This is particularly why the Abyss is scary because it hits someone unawares, and totally without preparation, and continues until of course, you ask it to stop
I encountered the Abyss early on in my life (when I was 15-16), and it continued until it ground to a halt at 16, since then I've lived in a sort of nightmare, but that's basically how it works
The "leap" itself (hence, letting go of conscious control, but unconsciously), merely happens to a person, and this is why it's scary (hence, a "leap")
If the adept succeeds in somehow slipping back into the groove (unconsciously, again) for several lifetimes, and finds himself unawares climbing the orgasm roller coaster, he or she may succeed again
It really, to me, just seems a lack of preparation, or some unexamined issue that bothers the adept, and prevents him or her from crossing
Notice how orgass (in French) mean "little death", and seem to depend on surrender to possibly being subsumed by your partner, and letting go of the fear of death, or bodily instincts, etc
Cheers!
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@Patriel Machad said
":shock:"
Dude, I really dislike it when someone just posts an emoticon, as if it is SO OBVIOUS, what you are in shock about, or think is stupid, or not to be listened to
This particular annoys me, because: if there's something that you think is dumb, you should be able to say it, clearly and concisely (as well as precisely)
When you post an emoticon, it makes it seems like it's SO OBVIOUS, what you're showing contempt for, that no one needs to say anything
But really, all it reveals is that you cannot say anything, or what is wrong with my post, or what bothers you
So, Patriel Machado, why
":shock:"
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@Patriel Machad said
"Well, it is obvious. That's the point.
In any case, as a Master of the Temple (or one in the making), you see my "contempt" (or whatever it is) as an instrument of your delight. So, "to hell with [you]"!
Peace.
"You know that "enlightened etiquette" doesn't really imply that you're enlightened, and no one is going think that a certain individual is enlightened because they respond to people in a certain way on an Internet forum (unless of course, that actually happens)
Anyways, what follows is really just for me:
What I meant earlier by the "SO OBVIOUS", is really just a form of "begging the question", or the "appeal to the obvious", which in fact may not be obvious, but really, nebulous
And in effect, my own "Abyss crossing", happened like this:
It spontaneously initiated itself at the age of 15 for me, prior to this "event", I had been doing no spiritual practices, nor any meditation, nor was I involved with any religion (to a great degree, I was somewhat a fan of Buddhism)
Some sort of roller coaster started, and a bunch of events in my life conspired together to create this coasting or "avalanche" effect, wherein everything fell together, this went on for only a few brief months
If I recall correctly it was around Oct-Nov of the the previous year, to around May of the next year, so perhaps six months in total
At the end of the process, wherein I had "failed" to cross, it was only then that I had become aware of the enormity of the "thing" I had failed to do, which, I didn't know was happening at the time
In some sense, perhaps it was "my" desire to "hijack" the process that didn't let it follow through
Prior to the event there was a slow, but steady trepidation that crept up to the "avalanche", it was somewhat of an intimation, or suspense, that something big was going to happen, finally it initiated itself, although in some senses I helped it and created the drama, I couldn't "hold water anymore" (that is how I described it to some people)
Eventually, "I" died, somehow, inexplicably, and have been residing in some sort of wasteland ever since
The events that surrounded the "initiation" were "incidental", "consciously" ("at the time"), they were what I complained about
The crossing itself, also incidental!
Prior to the "thing happening", almost zero spiritual practice, I did do a few sits of Vipassana on my own, but these sits were around 10 minutes each time, and there were no more than 5 serious ones
"During the thing", if that can even be said, almost no spiritual practice, but was assiduously involved in reading Chinese astrology (Sizhu Bazi)
And only afterwards, did I become aware that I had failed in something that I wasn't even consciously doing!
So I attempted to pick up the pieces
Cheers friend!
