14 June - (Water) Liber LXV, 3:8-9
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8. But I beheld in thee a certain taint, even in that wherein I delighted.
9. I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime. -
8. But I beheld in thee a certain taint, even in that wherein I delighted.
9. I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime.Upon first being exposed to this verse, the word taint, in my mind, carried a negative association with it. Over time my perspective has changed and I now view the taint as complementary instead of as a disturbance or a running river. I'm reminded of Rumi references to vinegar and honey.
"I add a little vinegar to the honey I give.
The bite of scolding makes ecstasy more familiar."and
"I have disappeared like a drop of vinegar in an ocean of honey"
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8. But I beheld in thee a certain taint, even in that wherein I delighted.
9. I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime.It's hard to argue with the experience of pleasure. It's easy to lie to oneself that one does not really want the things of the world. We want to be good, but we also want to be bad.
Corruption is a necessary part of all things. The word 'things' challenges me and I wonder what it/they are in themselves—what reality they betray. They certainly betray illusion and delusion, which two things—illusion and delusion—I recognize as a kind of reality, a part of the whole.
Is the problem simply about perspective; blindness equaling taint? In which case, all is as it is and will remain what it is, and only the quality of our appreciation will change as we walk the path.
Waters' perfection is that it reflects faithfully, both the light and the dark.** ...I beheld in thee a certain taint...**
Love and Will
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"8. But I beheld in thee a certain taint, even in that wherein I delighted.
- I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime."
Mortality is tainted (i.e., tinted, tinged). This isn't a moral judgment against it, just a characteristic (like, say, the surface flaws that characterize leather). This contrasts the domain of our mortality with the ideal of perfection which is the Angel, the transient in contrast to the eternal.
My meditation of the day is to witness and be mindful of the ultimate dissatisfaction of mortal things, and the gap between any or all of them on the one hand and the Angel on the other. That is, it is a meditation on dukkha, a recentering in the point of view that all things physical or psychological are ultimately insufficent and unsatisfying. (This becomes a meditation of viveka, in the sense of discriminating such things - actually divorcing them! - from any relationship to the Angel.)
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"8. But I beheld in thee a certain taint, even in that wherein I delighted.
- I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime."
"My meditation of the day is to witness and be mindful of the ultimate dissatisfaction of mortal things, and the gap between any or all of them on the one hand and the Angel on the other. That is, it is a meditation on dukkha, a recentering in the point of view that all things physical or psychological are ultimately insufficent and unsatisfying. (This becomes a meditation of viveka, in the sense of discriminating such things - actually divorcing them! - from any relationship to the Angel.)"
Yesterday as I was running some errands at work, it occured to me that the transient nature of everything below the Abyss sucks. I got that everything on earth has a shelf life. I felt very sober yet liberated. And since we've moved into water I feel a sort of penetrating indifference that is both uncomfortable and a saving grace.
Today, I just feel the need to be silent. I do not want to talk to anyone. I don't really care about anyone. Especially small talk. I just want to be silent. All day.
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I'm intrigued by the Blind Worm of Slime image.
At first, I took the "taint of thy father the ape" to be a certain way of saying, "I see that you are an animal (have evolved from)". That meant that the BWS (Blind Worm of Slime) became an image for creatures even further back in our evolution. Then it changed to be an image of the DNA spiral. But after reading a bunch of other instances where that term comes up, now I'm seeing it as just a lower lifeform - perhaps a derogatory term for a non-initiate of sorts... I'm still grasping at what technically Crowley meant by that image.
In Clouds Without Water:
"There is an alchemy to heal the hurt Done to our love by shame the dragon of ill With his allies the fear, that wars begirt With clouds, and that sad sceptic in the will That sneaks within our citadel, that steals The keys and opens stealthily the gates When we are sleeping, when the dawn conceals Its earliest glimmer and our blood abates Awhile its tide ! O mystic maiden o’ mine, Did I not warn you of the insulting foes ? Blind worms that writhe for envy, pious swine That gnash their teeth to espy the gold and rose Out flaming like the dawn when kiss for kiss Passed and for ever sealed our bale and bliss. "
In AHA:
"OLYMPAS - Crushed like a blind-worm by the heel
Of all I am, perceive, and feel,
My truth was but the partial pang
That chanced to strike me as I sang.
In the beginning, violence
Marks the extinction of the sense.
Anguish and rapture rack the soul.
These are disruptions of control."In Equinox Vol I No iii, The Sorcerer:
"To the blind worm, the sun is as the fluttering of warm wings in the outer darkness, and the stars are not; to the savage, as welcome ball of fire, and the glittering eyes of the beasts of night: to us, as spheres of earth's familiar elements and many hundred million miles away. And to the man of ten thousand years hence ___ who knows!"
In Equinox, AT THE FORK OF THE ROADS:
"Many days have I expected you,” he exclaimed, “many days have I wept over you. I see your destiny—how thin a thread links you to that mighty Brotherhood of the Silver Star whose trembling neophyte I am—how twisted and thick are the tentacles of the Black Octopus whom you now serve. Ah! wrench yourself away while you are yet linked with us: I would not that you sank into the Ineffable Slime. Blind and bestial are the worms of the Slime: come to me, and by the Faith of the Star, I will save you.”"
Maybe just the male version of this female version (Cat of Slime): (from Aethyr)
"Beware, therefore, O thou who art appointed to understand the secret of the Outermost Abyss, for in every Abyss thou must assume the mask and form of the Angel thereof. Hadst thou a name, thou wert irrevocably lost. Search, therefore, if there be yet one drop of blood that is not gathered into the cup of Babylon the Beautiful: for in that little pile of dust, if there could be one drop of blood, it should be utterly corrupt; it should breed scorpions, and vipers, and the cat of slime."
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"(This becomes a meditation of viveka, in the sense of discriminating such things - actually divorcing them! - from any relationship to the Angel.)"
Thank you for that. That's the first time I've heard of that concept. Not that I was....
Nevermind.
Thanks.
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I am base
I am lowYa know, when I was a little girl I was told by my big brother what Taint meant. It ain't your kitty cat, and it aint your Heaney highway, it taint either, but the boys won't care.
The spot between coming and going,
That spot,
Which can be brought to orgasm
Between the delight of life and deathThe story of the princess, who kisses the toad
And then he becomes....her princeWe were nothing more then a byproduct
In evolutionI have heard people say that we were born in original sin
That we are tainted
And it is our duty
To overcome thisAnd that is what I am hearing here.
Tin man, you rock my world
Thanks for sharing those words -
@Jim Eshelman said
"I beheld in thee the taint of thy father the ape, of thy grandsire the Blind Worm of Slime."
I saw you as you are, Nephesh - just instict (without mind and intuition), a neverending cirle (without point in the middle)
I saw you as you are, progeny of that which receives not, nor recognizes Light