HGA name (again)
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That's one of the sanest posts on this topic I've seen to date.
As Soror Meral was wont to say when I had some sort of "inner revelation," and particularly on this exact topic: "Good, now you have to prove it with your work."
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@Jim Eshelman said
"That's one of the sanest posts on this topic I've seen to date.
As Soror Meral was wont to say when I had some sort of "inner revelation," and particularly on this exact topic: "Good, now you have to prove it with your work.""
That's interesting, because I was looking through my diary entries from that period, and comparing them to my life as it is now, and the traits and ideas that I had written down at that point are very much manifesting in my life in the present, albeit it's not particularly pleasant and no-one in their right mind would actually choose to go through these sorts of Ordeals.
I have to ask myself "did I bring this on myself?" to which the answer would have to be yes, in a sense, because I stated some time ago that it was my Will to pursue the Great Work, but that fact does not make it any easier.
On the other hand, there is the possibility that I simply allowed some ancient desert daemon into my life to wreak havoc. and then another though, "is there any difference?"
whatever the root cause, the coincidence of me receiving this particular name and then my life developing along lines seemingly tailor made to reflect the name are striking.
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@Solitarius said
"I thought I'd post this after reading another post today about how to interpret the name of one's HGA."
That was probably me, and thank you for posting your experiences. Anything is a help, I'm sure you've felt the same way, when you have something so tremendous on your hands.
I can't say that what I've come across is the name of my HGA for sure, but is something I will surely keep aside for experiences to come. Unfortunately, the whole name of mine isn't in any literature that I've been able to find thus far. A part of the name I've seen before (and I've got to deal with that), but the name as a whole is coming up a blank. I'd say the name I wrote appears more Enochian (which is interesting because of everything I've been reading and practicing, it's probably what I've spent the least time on) as it's definitely unpronounceable otherwise.
I'm a pretty strong believer in the message that your HGA can send you to kind of get you to see the way and help lead you to it on a more steady course. I feel that the name of ones HGA would some how relate to their true will or higher purpose. In as much, I'd think the name would be personally resonant with you.
I'm still stumbling through the darkness stubbing toes so I might be really left field here.
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I think at this stage in the game we're all stumbling about in the dark a bit, but that's perfectly all right as long as we don't give up or try to turn back.
I think what surprised me most upon receiving the name was the way in which it was delivered, not in an elaborate ritual or in a blinding flash of revelation, but in a moment when my mind relaxed and went blank for a few seconds, and there it was.
Not that it was particularly flattering either, because after examining the Name and all of it's ramifications, it didn't promise an easier ride from thereon, quite the contrary; but what it did do is offer is a method, a modus operandi if you like, and the assurance that although things would continue to be tough, and probably get tougher, that was ok because this was the way it was supposed to be.
So yeah, I agree with what you say about the name pointing towards a higher purpose; I would be inclined to think that in my case at least, the name is actually a glyph for my way of being/going, as much as it is the name of my HGA.
In fact, I'd go so far as to say that the name of one's HGA would also contain or exemplify ones path in the great work.
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@Elmida said
"But what if you're 99,5% sure that you've received the name of your HGA? Without having actually SEARCHED for it, and just received it? How do you go on from there?"
What's the actual question? (That is: I can imagine multiple questions, each arising from independent motives, arising from this.)
Without further clarification of the question, the answer that comes to mind is: Do what you would do next if you didn't know the name.
For example, if someone in A.'.A.'. receives this in advance of 5=6, then the answer (regarding their training is): Keep going. FInish, step-by-step, the work of your current grade, and then the next, and so on. (For example, I got the name as a 2=9, but didn't really get that I'd gotten it until somewhere in 3=8. Meanwhile, I still had all the 3=8, 4=7, and Dom. Lim. work ahead of me.)
I don't know that the answer would differ for other parts of life.
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I think my problem is that I don't even know where I should start because there is no A.'.A.'., T.O.T or OTO for me to join and I can only get my information off the internet. At the moment I'm not even doing any Magick because I don't know how to do it. All I do know is that I'm 99,5% sure that the dream I had a while ago was me being in touch with my HGA. It was a very clear feeling that still stick with me today and keeps giving me strength.
I do feel that when I meditate I get "closer" to the HGA. So maybe that's at least a good direction.
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@Elmida said
"I think my problem is that I don't even know where I should start because there is no A.'.A.'., T.O.T or OTO for me to join and I can only get my information off the internet. "
Yeah. I totally see where you're coming from on this. The closest chapter to me is about two hours away, which is better than it is for some, I'm sure.
There are a lot of "hold the middle of this string" things out there on the internet that help pick up the basic gist of things but the whole concept of where to begin or a valid "flow chart" is kind of elusive in the "hard to find a good answer" way.
Personally, I'm probably going to pick up The Mystical and Magical System of the A.A. at some point. I don't expect it to be a "hold my hand" guide of what to do and when, but I think it might help find the end of the string, so to speak, and prevent me from stubbing my toe so much in the darkness
What I've done in the meantime since getting what I thought was my HGA's name? I put it to the side but haven't forgotten it. I do some extra work on it here and there and every time I seem to touch it it seems to have a deeper and more beautiful meaning. Do I know it's the HGA's name for sure?? No... but it's some kind of beautiful work that I could have in no way done on my own without something guiding my hand (literally).
Either way it's something special.
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I totally agree about just carrying on with the grade work, and that's exactly what I'm doing, there's no point going all loopy because you learned the name of your angel, you might say that one of the reasons you got the name was because you were doing something right, so it's best to keep on doing it, work steadily and logically, and keep a sense of perspective, its only a name after all.
And don't worry, because if you have indeed made preliminary contact, then you can be sure that you will be lead along the right path, so just relax, surrender, its all about surrender, or acquiescence if you like.
And if your not affiliated with some Order or other, try not to worry about that either (believe me I know all about that particular problem). If you feel inclined to do the A.'.A.'. work then simply begin that work, and keep trying to make contact with the order, you don't have to have anyone nearby to affiliate, you just need a bit of luck to make a contact.
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The only name I've recieved so far, was that of an Enochian Angel, whose name I didn't know before hand...
So would a self designed Meditation help learn the name of my HGA??? One person suggested its possible that the name I recieved COULD be his name but unlikely...
This specific friend, attempted to meditate on it for me (At time I wasn't in a state to meditate) and only recieved the first letter of the name I got...He also didn't know the original name I received... So I'm wondering, was it Garbled?
Apologies if such sounds stupid or worse,"RP" Thats all I got lol I don't study enochian and don't understand there nature. So my ignorance on the subject is kinda irritating.I also am not touching said system for this current time
I will admit that despite certain....Incidents that should put me of the system completely My monkey mind, Undisciplined took about three months forcing the name of enochians into my head, Final result was me breaking my ankles after jumping out a window. every time I recovered a Found a new name and another cycle started . I have a tendency to feel desire to study the system...
shrug
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FWIW...
Early in my magical career, while invoking a certain Enochian angel, it declared that it was my HGA. (I'll jump ahead and say that its name is not the name later given to me by the HGA in more intimate times.) I was quite unwilling to accept this, but the E. angel gave me unequivocal proof - unequivocal! (too long a story).
The clarifying perspective (already there at the time, but made clearer later) was that the HGA can take whatever form is useful to communicate. Since I had successfully connected to the Yetziratic manifestation of this characterologically suitable angel, THE Angel was able to "drop in" and use it
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Thanks for the input...
So, by saying this you imply that the Enochian is a form of the HGA??? Or that the HGA "pretended" to be the Enochian???
Apologies if I misunderstand what you say
EDIT: Cancel that I get what you mean now...I think.
So your implying because you where Connected to the Enochians Yetzirac form, your HGA assumed his form?
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In younger days, my angel once took the form of a cosmic Johnny Cash during an intense dream. That's not the same as saying Johnny Cash is my HGA, or that my angel's name is Johnny Cash.
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Av' said it eloquently, I'll rephrase for clarity:
I'm saying that the Angel is able to drop into any inner experience whatsoever and communicate; and by "any inner experience whatsoever," I also mean what we might call "outer experience." (Yes, the HGA can communicate through license plates in front of you, which isn't the same as saying that the HGA's name is 6J2781.)
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@Jim Eshelman said
"FWIW...
Early in my magical career, while invoking a certain Enochian angel, it declared that it was my HGA. (I'll jump ahead and say that its name is not the name later given to me by the HGA in more intimate times.) I was quite unwilling to accept this, but the E. angel gave me unequivocal proof - unequivocal! (too long a story).
The clarifying perspective (already there at the time, but made clearer later) was that the HGA can take whatever form is useful to communicate. Since I had successfully connected to the Yetziratic manifestation of this characterologically suitable angel, THE Angel was able to "drop in" and use it"
This is very similar to my own feeling on the matter, I have a name that I received, almost by accident, and that name is actually the name of a known angel/demon, (albeit one that was unknown to me before I heard it in meditation) so I don't feel that it is the final word in my HGA experience, but is more in the way of something I can use right now, until such time as I am able to make a clearer connection, (i.e. learn to listen better with less interference from my mind).
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@jackal said
"The only name I've recieved so far, was that of an Enochian Angel, whose name I didn't know before hand...
So would a self designed Meditation help learn the name of my HGA??? One person suggested its possible that the name I recieved COULD be his name but unlikely...
This specific friend, attempted to meditate on it for me (At time I wasn't in a state to meditate) and only recieved the first letter of the name I got...He also didn't know the original name I received... So I'm wondering, was it Garbled?
Apologies if such sounds stupid or worse,"RP" Thats all I got lol I don't study enochian and don't understand there nature. So my ignorance on the subject is kinda irritating.I also am not touching said system for this current time
I will admit that despite certain....Incidents that should put me of the system completely My monkey mind, Undisciplined took about three months forcing the name of enochians into my head, Final result was me breaking my ankles after jumping out a window. every time I recovered a Found a new name and another cycle started . I have a tendency to feel desire to study the system...
shrug"
Since then learnt a lot... the fact that the Grigori angels aren't actually Enochian angels from the traditional point of view...
So wondering what should I do if the name recieved was Grigori? Ignore it?
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@jackal said
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@jackal said
"The only name I've recieved so far, was that of an Enochian Angel, whose name I didn't know before hand...So would a self designed Meditation help learn the name of my HGA??? One person suggested its possible that the name I recieved COULD be his name but unlikely...
This specific friend, attempted to meditate on it for me (At time I wasn't in a state to meditate) and only recieved the first letter of the name I got...He also didn't know the original name I received... So I'm wondering, was it Garbled?
Apologies if such sounds stupid or worse,"RP" Thats all I got lol I don't study enochian and don't understand there nature. So my ignorance on the subject is kinda irritating.I also am not touching said system for this current time
I will admit that despite certain....Incidents that should put me of the system completely My monkey mind, Undisciplined took about three months forcing the name of enochians into my head, Final result was me breaking my ankles after jumping out a window. every time I recovered a Found a new name and another cycle started . I have a tendency to feel desire to study the system...
shrug"
Since then learnt a lot... the fact that the Grigori angels aren't actually Enochian angels from the traditional point of view...
So wondering what should I do if the name recieved was Grigori? Ignore it?"
93
Just use whatever you have to hand, and don't worry too much about it, Just don't let your results obsess you. (See Liber O section one for more info).
Remember that a scientific attitude is the best; experiment with whatever materials you have to hand and don't let your personal feelings get in the way.
In my own experience, and I think that I mentioned this before, I received a name last summer that I have since been using as a stand-in for that of my Angel (i,e. the closest thing to the genuine name that I am able to understand at this time).
Interestingly enough the name I was given is also that of one of the Grigori. I find that through working with it I have become increasingly sympathetic to these "Fallen Angels", quite what this means I don't know, but its certainly an interesting co-incidence.
93 93/93
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93,
Don't mean to jump this thread but I was wondering: Is it possible that the "HGA" is communicating with one all the time?
Love is the Law