12 July (Fire) Liber LXV, 4:3-4
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3. There is a beauty unspeakable in this heart of corruption, where the flowers are aflame.
4. Ah me! but the thirst of Thy joy parches up this throat, so that I cannot sing -
in the realm of Fire, the communion of human and the Angel is experienced as pure ecstasy, utter joy and rapture for both sides.
these flames of Beauty transcend all speech and sound.
only Silence remains. -
3. There is a beauty unspeakable in this heart of corruption, where the flowers are aflame.
I feel like I'm on a tour bus: "and on your right is the heart of corruption; built by a wealthy philanthropist, initially as a lucrative tax write off, it was designed to house recently expelled souls from the garden of Eden, and was closed in subsequent years because of scandal involving the abuse of the residents by the staff..." The reference to the** heart of corruption** brings me all the way back down into familiar territory, and right or wrong, I find I can relate it to the things of my world.
The reference to flowers reminds me of something I once heard from a spiritual teacher: "god made flowers so you might see that that bit of god in them that is also in you." In other words, their beauty was contrived as a device whereby you might wake up a little, ...or a lot. The idea was to see just beyond the outer from, by the grace of the form itself, and appreciate the fire within.
There is in fact a whole class of mystical experiences—Crowley's city of god for example—where the things of the world seem filled with a divine flame, an inner fire making them imperishable and precious. Even the slimy things of rot and decay seem full of grace in this head-space.
The beauty unspeakable is evidence of that portion of truth that allows us to be attracted to something, to desire it. We believe in it because there is something we cannot separate from the outer form that secretly resonates with the divine—Aleph Shin—ASh—fire.
The idea of the flowers are aflame is a very powerful notion, suggesting the garden—the provenance of the Master of the Temple—where such things grow, and also the feminine forms of this world that seem so lovely, desirable and worth the price of admission. The reference to a woman's flower is obvious but one I still want to make because it has been for me a source of great expectation, mystery, and joy.
The heaviest, richest, most intoxicating and scented flowers grow in the humid river valley, in deep shadows... ...manured by the corpses of fallen children, they grow like lush opium poppies, heady and dripping with nectar. Here is fire also.
Babalon is not only Venus and Luna, she is also fire!
4. Ah me! but the thirst of Thy joy parches up this throat, so that I cannot sing
When is joy a thirst and not a drink to satisfy desire or need? The throat is possibly Daath—knowledge, sexual intercourse...
This second line is a bit challenging, not because I don't understand it fully, which is a given in any case, but because I know my associations are anything but a correct assessment of exalted mystical states.
But here goes: it reminds me of that kind of sexual relationship where the real pleasure one derives from intercourse is not about ones own experiences, but about seeing the pleasure being experienced by ones partner.
Love and Will
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"**3. There is a beauty unspeakable in this heart of corruption, where the flowers are aflame.
- Ah me! but the thirst of Thy joy parches up this throat, so that I cannot sing**"
In response to yesterday's verses, I used a particular phrase that applies here: The Adept is seen by the Angel as being a perfection of imperfection. It is only as a secondary meaning that "corrupt" has come to mean dishonest, debased, etc. On the principle that "words actually mean what they originally meant" (which especially serves me well in relationship to the Holy Books from Liber L. on), "corrupt" just means "broken," especially "broken in pieces." The "heart of corruption" is distinctive because of its fragmentation? Hmm, rather than jump to a conclusion that it's a fine Ruach symbol, I have to take that into further examination today.
In any case, it is in this "heart of corruption," this perfection of imperfection which is "a beauty unspeakable," that the flowers are aflame. (Others have already done fine justice to this.)
The passion dries the Angel's throat figuratively. (Even here is another Venus/Netzach symbol, since Visuddha is the Venus chakra.) Thirst is dryness, and this dryness comes from heat - similar language is used through *Dark Night of the Soul, *for example. The Angel is "all choked up" for the love of the Adept.
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I get the impression that a new "being" is being created by the union of the microcosm and macrocosm that is new and different from either the Angel or Adept seperatley. This grooming seems like it has been part of the process of these different chapters as the Adept is "washed" in each element to prepare and purify his consciousness. Thus, there is the Angel that yearns for transfomation as well - not just the Adept. I gather from the intensity of the imagery that this moment is creeping closer and closer.
Even if this isn't altogether "true" I still enjoy the thought. It gives me a basis for understanding why Divinity reaches out to "me", for example, and why the divine would even consider union with so base a creature as I am. This helps kindle the feeling of devotion since there is a mutual yearning and not just a yelling out into space (which is valuable in its own way). Kind of a relief in a certain way that it isn't all controlled by my actions so to speak and does depend on a degree of grace and mutual Love.
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@mojorisin44 said
"Even if this isn't altogether "true" I still enjoy the thought. It gives me a basis for understanding why Divinity reaches out to "me", for example, and why the divine would even consider union with so base a creature as I am."
That's serving you for now, it seems. Eventually, you will need to drop the considerations that would create these doubts. I assure you that the Angel is every bit as interested in joining with you, as you (at your best) are interested in joining with the Angel.
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"I assure you that the Angel is every bit as interested in joining with you, as you (at your best) are interested in joining with the Angel."
Seeing this is both overwhelming and motivating at the same time. The impact of these last 4 verses on me has been like finding out the girl of my dreams thinks I'm the man of her dreams and she's telling the whole school and they're telling me now.
"3. There is a beauty unspeakable in this heart of corruption, where the flowers are aflame."
Yesterday I thought to myself "If I were perfect, the most incredible thing in the world to me would be something imperfect" and this verse says the same thing to me.
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We've mentioned the sexual nature of these visions; I'd like to share another avenue of thought (unknown river) to explore:
This is the chapter where we learn why the heck we should incarnate. Our "spiritual self" (HGA) / POV is telling us the story of why it bothered, which may just be a wonderfully flowery metaphor for explaining the big WHY AM I HERE:
"1. O crystal heart! I the Serpent clasp Thee; I drive home mine head into the central core of Thee, O God my beloved."
This is life/consciousness/spirit going into matter. This is the egg and sperm uniting. This is a baby in the womb being cooked up.
"2. Even as on the resounding wind-swept heights of Mitylene some god-like woman casts aside the lyre, and with her locks aflame as an aureole, plunges into the wet heart of the creation, so I, O Lord my God!"
This is the birth. I've heard of births being described in other terms than "some god-like woman casts aside the lyre" but hey...
When babies are born they "plunge into the wet heart of the creation"."3. There is a beauty unspeakable in this heart of corruption, where the flowers are aflame."
From Nothing (capital N) to the Universe - things probably are getting more colorful and there is things like change, and time, and events, and things like etc. too.
"4. Ah me! but the thirst of Thy joy parches up this throat, so that I cannot sing."
The baby screams out for air and makes it's first noise. Life is so happy here about being alive that it can't even exclaim it's own joy.
Just a random thought
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@Shadonis said
"If I were perfect, the most incredible thing in the world to me would be something imperfect."
Holy sh!t. That is all.
93, 93/93.
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@Jim Eshelman said
"Eventually, you will need to drop the considerations that would create these doubts."
Thanks for pointing that out. I definately have some shades of self-doubt sprinkled with a little shame in general shortcomings. More properly I might consider that everything in its proper place and alignment prepares the vessel to receive Divinity. I might then be able to use the "negative" as an opportunity instead of rock to hit my head on.
@Jim Eshelman said
"I assure you that the Angel is every bit as interested in joining with you, as you (at your best) are interested in joining with the Angel."
This is a different perspective for me here. Just picturing that on the other side of the table the same Angel that I seek also wants the same thing, mabe even to a greater degree than I realize the yearning within my conscious self. In many ways, I feel that I already know this, but perhaps some different thread has resonated with me that has come from this whole process.