College of Thelema: Thelemic Education

We all know about Crowley's appetites. Some of us may have even followed in his footsteps (raises hand)... I would even dare to say that one can't understand where he was coming from until one has been successfully addicted to heroin (not difficult).

All this discipline. All this practice to tame the mind and tendencies. How could he preach and do all that he did "for mankind" while riding the white pony to his death-bed? Is this just another classic case of "do what I say and not what I do" ?

"take strange drugs unto me" I'd say a lifetime of heroin addiction makes that drug very NOT strange to him. I could see the value if his experience with H was an experimental or rituallistic use, but it wasn't. He was a drop-dead junkie, hands down... not to mention the sex addiction as well..

Don't get me wrong.. I'm still a fan. His photo is still on my wall, next to the buddha.

What's my point? I guess I wonder who has followed his footsteps in this regard. Can we take what we want from the man and declare ourselves Thelemites? What Themite is willing to dive into the deep sea of addiction in order realize what it was like to be Crowley? I, for one, feel a little cheated and lied to. Personally, I believe he was lying to himself the whole time. He died an addict. How's that for discipline?
\Marz

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Newbie here... 1st post on the board.. whooo

I often wonder about others' experiences with the instructions in the Equinox regarding pranayama. I have practiced most of them with dilligence. At the peak, I was doing the 10-30-20 (in-hold-out). I would do this either with both nostrils or alternating, as described in the instructions. (15 years experience w/this). I also did a lot of the japanese style 15-9-15-9 (hold on both ends). Empty holds are the most punishing IMO.

It was like straight out of the book. After battling the "strain" in the beginning (AKA: suffocation), the breathing would become automatic and breaks were unheard-of. Sweat pours out.. the vital heat all over.. fierce rigidity in the arms and abdomen. I would rub the sweat back in, as par AC's instructions in order to "increase the rigidity".

Addition of the "Aum Shi-Va Ya Va-Shi Aum" mantra, used as a timing device in order to discard with the now unnecessary counting resulted in a kind of mental loop which was accompanied by bliss and time-loss. I see little use in 'naming' the state, it was what it was. I will say that I cannot replicate the state using buddist vipasana type meditation techniques (my new-found practice). I cannot think of anything else that has happened in my life that compares to this experience of bliss.

I have never met or spoken to anyone that has experienced this to such a degree. There were many, many times when my breath has exploded due to the extreme strain, especially with the empty-lung breath holds. These breaks would annoy, and I would resolve to either die of suffocation, or pass out trying. This is when I got "over the hump" and the practice became somewhat automatic and effortless (difficult to STOP, actually..)

So, am I just an extremist, or do all of you guys take it to this end? After reading through the board a bit, it seems like there are some very scholarly folks on here (not I..). Are there any practitioners? Please share your experience if you like.

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marz