College of Thelema: Thelemic Education

Is no one going to eviscerate me for commenting on the Book of the Law? I'm disappointed. I was rather looking forward to that.

I am new to Thelema as well. I also have bipolar, type I. There are people saying that I might also have a personality disorder because I have extremely low self-esteem. I have been trying to practice for several months steadily, but have been interested for longer than that.

My big thing is that I keep thinking I'm just plain not good enough for Thelema. Not strong enough, not stable enough, just not good enough. And of course I could probably find someone who would tell me that I was good enough, but then, are they really being Thelemic? It always seemed to me that there was no room for weakness.

Remember this?

"Yea! deem not of change: ye shall be as ye are, & not other. Therefore the kings of the earth shall be Kings for ever: the slaves shall serve. There is none that shall be cast down or lifted up: all is ever as it was. Yet there are masked ones my servants: it may be that yonder beggar is a King. A King may choose his garment as he will: there is no certain test: but a beggar cannot hide his povert - Liber Al Vel Legis, 2:58"

That seems to be saying that if you're not strong, well, you're just not strong, and there's no way to change it. It also implies, like Nietzsche does, that certain people are kings and certain people are slaves, naturally. Actually, it has quite a bit to do with Nietzsche, who I think was inspired, as well. However, it also says that a king can be disguised as a begger, implying that some people who seem to be slaves are not. On the gripping hand, the king has chosen to appear as a slave; to appear weak - he is really strong. If he was not strong, he wouldn't be capable of making that choice - he has the power of self-valuation, whereas the slave does not. The slave can only point at someone and say "You are evil," but cannot point at himself and say "I am good." This can't change. Whether Thelema is for you or not, you have a True Will, and for some people, that is to be a slave. Thou hast no right but to do thy will. Room for such people in Thelema? Probably not.

The first chapter makes me think I can be a Thelemite, but the second chapter makes me think otherwise. The second chapter is also my favorite chapter, and the verse I quoted my second-favorite verse.

So, what would you say to someone who's doing their first Goetic evocation this Friday?

Hi. I am here because I am genuinely curious about Thelema. At the same time, however, I am a bit apprehensive about the whole thing, because I had a rather horrific run-in a few years back with some self-styled Crowley followers. I figure I need to face my fear if I'm to be a well-versed occultist, which is my goal, so here I am.

As Thelemites, do you feel that you follow Crowley, so to speak, or do you see him as being incidental to the Thelema? Do you believe he was a good example of a Thelemite?