College of Thelema: Thelemic Education

I'll give it another go. It's just hard for me to get excited about it. However, the visualizations that have come up have been interesting on their own. Maybe I was just focusing too hard on making sure that I get it done rather than just easing in to it. When I miss a workout, or when I go over my dietary budget, I don't sweat it, and just write it off and do it the next day. I guess I need to approach it in that way. Just don't worry about it so much.

I have started doing LBRP daily now, and actually doing it twice usually (morning invoking, nightly banish).

Heh. I just noticed something. When I do resh on a daily basis, my internal clock of sorts seems more in balance. I get really tired at night, I get to sleep earlier, and I generally feel more rested. On days I skip practice altogether, I seem to stay up later just wasting time. I haven't journaled this properly, so I don't have the best data to go off from but thinking about the past week seems to reinforce that.

@Angel of Death said

"I noticed you have only been doing this for less then a month.

I have a lot of ambitions, but only a certain amount of energy and time in the day.
Before I even think about undertaking something new, something that demands a portion of that time and energy everyday I seriously think about everything else I am already doing and see how this new task can fit in.
Once I believe it can fit in, in an act of compassion towards myself I suppose, I commit to a certain specific time that I will do this task. For example I am working on improving my swimming and diving, so I made an agreement with myself that come he'll or high water, I will be in that pool for at least and hour three times a week, for one month.
And I hold myself to that personal contract. I will complete what I agreed to, no matter if I don't feel like it anymore. I know that at the end of the month, I can walk away and say I'm Done!

Resh and Will are tools to improve and build upon your own personal integrity. If a person is to maximize there health and successful navigation of life it is pretty darn imperative to use some sort of tool, like Will and Resh."

True enough. I, like most people, have trouble sticking to new habits. I have trouble sustaining practices and establishing habits that aren't particularly exciting to me. The example I brought up with exercise was to illustrate that not all routines/practices/programs will be easy to sustain, and that others may work where others have failed. Given where I'm at in life at this moment, it just feels like there is so much momentum in a certain way that makes it difficult to change my current course. Perhaps, it is as Los had previously mentioned, that ceremonial ritual is a fantasy/escape, at least in my current situation.

My conclusions thus far are that one of two things have or must happen.

1. I should continue searching for a similar practice that I jive with that captures the same essence and purpose (i.e. instead of running, which I hate, I bodybuild, which I enjoy)
2. Alternatively, I just keep doing the work and persevere even if I don't like it or really want to.

I don't want to make this thread about me, but open this up to general discussion.

I've given up doing Resh. I feel no connection to it, it's too awkward to do in public (not that I am afriad of public perception, it's just that having to go out of my way to do things at certain times throughout the day is too much for me at the moment), and I'm just not "into it." It feels like a chore to me, and that really detracts from a nice experience for myself. Call me lazy I suppose. This isn't in anyway a criticism of the ritual itself.

I'm comparing this to physical exercise. It's important to exercise somewhat regularly if you want your body to do the things you want it to do. For a long time I wanted to lose weight, and I've tried all sorts of machines, running, swimming, etc. but nothing ever lasted longer than a few weeks. That is, until I started doing a bodybuilding routine with barbells. Now I hit the gym 2-3 times a week at least, have lost almost 15 pounds, and have been doing consistently for over 3 months.

Are Resh and Will truly seeds of the work? Do you all feel them a neccessary foundation upon which to perform your magickal work?

I think the more that we understand about the nature of the laws of physics and what matter/energy/physical manifestations are, the more we slip away from the popular Materialism that Legis referenced. That doesn't neccessarily mean we then must begin to attritube inner experiences to anything in particular.

Personally, I generally tend to agree with Los (though I haven't read through all of your back and forth discussions). I'm a newbie to magickal practice and thelema in general, but I tend to view the gods/spirits/symbols as a framework, a language through which the subconcious and unconcious mind uses to inform our concious minds, and the whole of the practice is forming that language to be usable. That's how I see it at the moment. It's nearly impossible to fully explain the inner workings of our minds and nature of conciousness, so I leave that as an unknown, a realm without much need for explanation.

I like what Lon DuQuette said "It's all in your head, you just have no idea how big your head is."

@Deus Ex Machina said

"If saying Will before eating becomes too ingrained and thus an automated behavior... that might somewhat defeat the purpose of doing it. That's an interesting thought, I find."

Duly noted. What I feel I'm trying to achieve here is basically two fold.

First, it's in the book that I've chosen to follow (David Shoemaker's Living Thelema). It sounds like a silly reason on it's own, but I want to follow a basic structure of "attainment". I've recently started bodybuilding, and following a well documented regimen has been wonderful in that aspect. I see no reason not to follow a specific structure that I can later add to or modify to suit my needs/understanding.

Second, I'm trying to follow the idea along the lines of "pray with your words, and soon you'll be praying with your heart." I don't want it to become simply a habit, but in essence it needs to be something of a habit, just like basic grooming. I mean, I don't always stop and ask myself why I am shaving or brushing my teeth. I want to stay focused on finding my true will, and this seems like a very basic practice that will keep me subconciously reminded of that goal. I want to stay mindful.

Los, I basically agree with your points. I'm not neccessarily trying to keep things separate, though to be quite honest, it is a bit separate, at least as in as separate as my other personal goals are from the current commitments I have made. I sometimes feel like "magick" is somewhat of an escape, I won't lie. My work life is not particularly interesting, but it provides my family with what we need to survive. My family life is challenging at times, yet fun, but at the moment, very attention demanding. The little time I take away from this is a slight bit of escape, a time to reflect and feel, to imagine, to comprehend the great mysteries in my head and in the universe. I do hear what you're saying though. It's not separate, really.

EDIT: Seriously, I just simply cannot remember to say will. I forgot at every moment today. In the past 3 days since I've started, I've only said will maybe 2 times. Eh. I'm not beating myself up over it or anything. I think it's time I break out the big guns and set a phone reminder of some sort. Just put an icon on my phone. I feel oh so clever.

I did my minerval almost 10 years ago, at the now gone 93 Oasis. It was a nice ceremony, but at the time I had only attended one gnostic mass, had only really met a few people, and didn't really put the work into studying the symbolism and taking classes. I was a really shy person at the time, and for whatever reason, I felt somewhat intimidated by the whole process. Nobody was being intimidating in any way mind you (quite the opposite actually), but I just felt so lost and confused at the time that I never really felt much connection and almost immediately after that I lost contact with most of the members.

I've matured a LOT since then in many ways, and recently have been attracted to thelemic thought and practice, though I'm not sure if I would have the time now to commit myself to a fraternal organization. If the wife lets me, I might do the weekly magick classes again at Lon Milo Duquette's house. He's a riot.

Didn't mean to hijack your thread, I'm glad you had a wonderful experience. To add to the thread, yea, I didn't put much into it, and didn't get much out of it. So, there's that!

@mark0987 said

"93,

"Any practical tips on how not to forget? "

For will, the only real way is to just continuously practice it until it becomes a natural act. You shouldn't just be saying will, the words you're saying should have meaning. Being able to dedicated your food and drink to the great work is basically you affirming, that everything you do for your survival and all the energy yo acquire is to be put towards this accomplishment of the great work. I wouldn't even say "So that I may accomplish the great work", I would specificlly state what it is you wish to accomplish-what your spiritual goal is. Of course if there is a preliminary goal for this spiritual goal state that instead. Having a connection with the statements will embed it more in your mind. I found that breakfast was the hardest time to remember saying will (I am very dosy in the morning). On my iphone I used to put a title on my alarm which said "Resh" and "will" so I didn;t forget.

As for Resh I used to set 4 sets of alarms on my phone; Dawn (or when I get up), Solar noon, Sunset and Midnight. But now once I know the solar noon and sunset times for the day, I find that the actions come naturally. I just know when it's time to do Resh. Of course if you've had a few afternoon drinks you may slip out of it, but when I see the sunset my mind is immediately focused upon Resh. Again continued practice makes these things natural, which is what you want with any set of actions- the feeling they are natural."

I've done that for Resh too. There's a web app that I found on this forum that sends you a text message or email based on the actual position of the Sun relative to your current position on Earth (I believe it's on KeepSilence.com or .org, I forget right now). I'm actually thinking of incorporating that into an Android application that would do basically the same thing (probably a direct tie-in to the app, but allow for purely android alarms or web based alarms instead of email or text messages).

I just need a way to remind myself to say will before meals. I missed it again for lunch, but just ended up saying it after I finished. Better than not at all I suppose.

In terms of your suggestion to replace "to accomplish the great work" with a specfic spiritual goal, I agree in theory, but in practice, I suffer from a severe case of "I don't know what my goals are." This permeates all aspects on my being, not just spiritually, though I suppose that is something I need to work on. For right now, my only immediate spiritual goal is to make Resh, saying Will, doing a daily 4-fold breath, and journaling all that a natural daily practice, and observing the effects on each on my understanding of myself. I suppose that will do for now! Problem solved!

Thanks Los,

This makes Resh pretty clear for me (to a point), although it'll take some time for me to really absorb it all. I've finally memorized the unity adoration. I have completely forgotten to "say will" before meals. Any practical tips on how not to forget? I know it's an excuse, but I just completed a move to a new apartment yesterday, and my mind has been pretty focused on all that, and the wife and I have barely given ourselves time to rest (nevermind the fact that our 2 year old NEVER gives us time to rest haha).

@Lykathea said

""What is thy will" and "To what end" until the question is fully solved is one of the best (****)-tests for yourself out there. Saying Will before such a basic activity such as eating brings this idea of Thelema to every aspect of your life.

Sometimes I find myself mindlessly doing... anything at all. And I say: "what is thy will", to my lower self, then, "to what end" in the same formulation as Will, until I am able to create a satisfactory answer for myself. Great trick to help you 'snap out of it'."

I JUST started doing a daily magickal regimen (like today), which right now simply consists of Resh, saying Will, and relaxing with 4-fold breath for as long as I can find time (which is difficult right now). edit: AND keep a journal

I've phrased saying Will when I'm by myself like this: "It is my will to eat and drink, that I may fortify my body thereby, in order to accomplish the Great Work." I do see the value in phrasing it the whole way with the questions even when by yourself by your example. I probably should add in the whole "Do what thou wilt..." part too.

I used to do some daily magickal activity years ago including LBRP, Middle Pillar, dream work, but never really did Resh or say will. I'm hoping that by focusing on these first and foremost, I will be able to remained focus on my clearer goals of finding my True Will this time around (I think before I just thought it was "cool" and wasn't really focused on any particular goal).

As for Resh, I never noticed before, but in David Shoemaker's "Living Thelema" there's a "unity adoration" that I've never even noticed referenced in other books. It's going to take a while before I really memorize everything, but that just added a bit more.

Hi everybody,

For reasons I am not even sure of, my interest in Thelema has been reignited as of late. I was initiated Minerval in OTO back in 2004/2005, but didn't really stick around long enough to form any long term bonds with people. I was very shy back then, and didn't really know what I wanted. I had limited magickal and mystical practice, but didn't really ever follow through with much of it. I would follow books like Donald Michael Kraig's Modern Magick up to a certain point and then either burn out or get distracted by other things.

Then I got married, had a child, and have another one on the way later this year. These events have been extremely transformative for me, and have really forced me to really shed a lot of my old ways.

Without getting too rambly, essentially what I want now is to find my true will, my essense of being. I just picked up "Living Thelema" by Dr. Shoemaker and I like his style of writing. I'm going to be working through his recommended magickal regimen, and then after a while, I will try to follow the A.'.A.'. syllabus. I doubt I will have much time in the coming years (2 small kids) to get fully involved with any orders of organized groups, so hopefully I'm able to share ideas and learn from some of experiences you all have.

Glad to be here!

edit: changed subject line to meet guidelines (I thought something seemed off!)