@Ben Reed said
"Greetings!
There is a lot of valuable information in the Simon Necronomicon. I think that you can find many answers about the tome at the following website:
www.warlockasylum.wordpress.com
Stay Blessed"
Yes, I do appreciate all what Warlock Asylum has written on the matter, but I'm afraid that without his directions the beginner could easily get confused. Thanks.
@Veronica said
""suddenly mortal"
what does that mean?
when we are now here, fully present"
That's right, moreover being a mother it's your duty anyway. I couldn't be so brave to grow an offspring. The risk of growing myself is quite enough to me. I've witnessed both wonders and failures, both triumphs of the will and miserable wastes of human potential. Life remains a mystery to me and death even a greater mystery. I know nothing after all.
very interesting Zi, I have to think more about what you said, however i think ultimately spirituality should be life centered but one cannot avoid the subjective being human. have you read any of Peter Carolls books Liber Null and Pschonaut, Liber KKK? i think you may get some benefit thereof."
I hope not to sound immodest but I've made it to 8 years of membership in the IOT as well 
having now nothing to do therewith as well. Of course, I don't sorry about my past - it has made me what I'm now, though I'm not too proud of what I am now except that I've managed to survive a lot of psycho-physical turmoils. In fact I'm nowhere. I could analyze this nowhere situation to now & here only. What I have come to know for sure is that human is not only mortal but often suddenly mortal. This knowledge is valuable because it's a knowledge of my organic self, not an intellectual concept, so I have no time for anything except to do my will, even when I seem a total failure for the rest of humanity including the magicians who are always in contest with each other to prove who is more compentent. In a certain sense it could be said I'm in the abyss and I've realized what a dangerous psychopath am I, yet I'm neither a "black brother" nor a "master of temple". My ego is dead yet I'm still alive, and could seem quite sane when necessary 
@Veronica said
"I have been blessed myself with a 180 degree turn about,
and have seen some others do similiar feats.
While it seems impossible, and improbable
I do witness miracles in human behaviors and perceptions.
Snake medicine is wonderful for those 180's...."
Do you mean that you're able to assemble your peripheral sight into a point behind your back?
@Veronica said
"Last week I was gifted with Owl's wings, and I have a hibernarium of sorts under my house.
Hibernarium? Hmmm...
Your medicine must be very strong
I'm not so convinced the human inability of changing bad habits being so strong.
welcome
"
Thanks
@Labyrinthus said
"Hi Zi,
How do you judge between a lunar path and a Solar?"
Hi Labyrinthus
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Well as my Lunar characteristics I would point out that I seek first of all to evolve my emotional intelligence via practising sorcery rather than qabalist magick - by recognizing and following the limbic impulses coming from my organic self rather than by imposing on my behaviour some will-power patterns inspired by some wishful thinking dedicated to some "higher" ideal. I put awareness before consciousness, and intent before will. I seek the spiritual through the physical only, by investigating my body relationship with the gravitation and reducing the thinking process to a minimum.
As for the ideals - I regard myself as following the way of the Truly Forwarded Ones what does the Sumerian word for gods dingir means. Anunnaki in Sumerian means Those of the Noble Sperm i.e. of the noble sperm of the Great Bull of Heaven, the offspring of An the star god, the idea of the incarnated star-gods. It could be said that the process of the Great Work is a process of remembering who you are after all. Otherwise said, my magical ideal extends along the emergence of the sentient life from the primeval slime to its quest for the stars, or forward back to the roots to become one with my abysal source. The unconscious is the organism itself. The body is more than what the anatomy says about it as well as the unconscious is more than what the psychology says about it. The organic self is the gate to the Shadow - the source of all magick. The organic self is a chance to immortality as well. The memory of its experience of both the Shadow and the consciousness while alive could be preserved.
Another Lunar characteristic of mine is my preference to trance states, possessions, rituals dedicated to dark female deities, or feminine male deities, or female Solar deities, shamanic-like trips when contacting the wyrd. My fetch often takes the forms of owlets or snakes when I wander through the wilderness. I prefer to work within the Sumerian rather than within the Egyptian tradition, or get inspired by the Thracian mythos and the Germanic Eddas rather than by the Graeco-Roman classicism. My spirituality is life-centred rather than human-centred, to me humanity is a means of the sentient life rather than vice versa.
So I hope to have given to you some notion of my Lunar approach which I feel far more true to myself than when at the time I studied the Holy Books of Thelema, the Qabalah, the Golden Dawn system, the A.'. A .'. system, when experimenting with and practising most of the Book 4's liberi, when discovered the secret word of Liber Pyramidos, when practised the Mass of the Phoenix together with Liber Resh for 44 days, or Liber Samekh for 100 days, when undergone through the first three degree of the O.T.O. etc., when conducting a camp in my country etc. and etc. Though now I have nothing do with that past of mine, somehow I do feel myself more a Thelemite than before. Now I do feel more empathy with the spirit of Aleister Crowley (despite of the possibility to blame me as a "Black Brother" 
) than before. The problem is only that many Thelemites tend to not understand me 
Yet I tend not to make a tragedy thereof
There is no conflict between any older and younger generations of gods in the original Sumerian mythos. Simon's Necronomicon is based on the later Babylonian mythos Enuma Elish where there is such a conflict indeed, but I don't think it's very wise for a Thelemitic magician who seeks to integrate all parts of his or her being to keep up such a dualist split in his/her psychocosm. No need to keep up such a conflict between our human brain and our reptilian brain - the essence of the Great Work is to integrate them.
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Thelema was my beginning to walk on the path more than 20 years ago. Though I chose the Lunar path instead of the Solar one, I still feel a Thelemite in some informal way. The ways of the will are often incomprehensible. Hope to contact with stars' essences here.
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