The 5 Preliminaries -

Anchorite

(Firstly - My daily self vowed Probabtioner work is -
LIRP mornings/LBRP evenings.
Asana x2 30 mins (and increasing)
Middle Pillar Ritual and Circulation of the Body of light.
Intellectual meditations and stimulation via Sacred Texts, Gematria.Correspondances. Comparitive mysticism.Kaballa.
Mindfulness meditation as much as possible through the day.
Work to establish basic communication with the angel.
Energised enthusiasm through music.
Concentration excerises. BOL excercises alternating.
Dream dairy.
Stretching constantly. I mean every minute.
Also Energised Meditation by Hyatt a few times a week.)

So after doing these endlessly I find nothing is really improving in health or mental attitude after an initial upswing with the invoking ritual of the pentagram.

So I was looking at the 5 Preliminaries in order to tackle my specific circumstances. Here is an example of what I've worked out so far.

Definition of Purpose - To be able to not feel as if I am being killed by my own body and to actually feel ok emotionally.
(Issue - I have CFS and am unable to work and have been unable to work for the last 18 years. I've also become terrifically isolated as a result of not being able to travel. I've not seen a friend in 2 years.
I have social anxiety when I am around more than one person and I begin to feel intense anger and adrenaline to shaking with rage within 2-4 minutes).

Is it consistant with the True Will - I have no idea. Are some people here to suffer? History seems to prove so.
Is it necessary - if it is my True Will then it is 100% necessary.
Take action! - I cannot take action. Because I cannot take action this ritual is necessary.
Creative Visulisation - seeing myself mobile, being able to breathe and smiling?

Confront the Shadow - 'You aren't meant to be happy. Everything will go wrong as it has every step before. You hate yourself. Don't fool yourself. Just struggle to breathe until you die. Magick for money wont work. The Therapist will not want to work with you anyway. Even if she does she'll be the same as all the others. Stop fooling yourself and accept the world is sorrow that you are running away from.

Result -
I understand the Qlipoth will destroy the intentions to get better.

Where do I go from here? What would be the correct magickal way to proceed? I cannot imagine I would be able to delve into the qlipothic forces and transmute them alone at my level. Can imagine it being actively suicidal to do.
It seems like a checkmate more than a stalemate.
Help.

LD330

Do you exercise or keep a healthy diet?

If you're trying to get your life together it might help to get the basics down first (assuming you don't already). Exercise, a healthy diet and meditation are keystone habits that will help all other endeavors in your life.

Other practices you might want to look into are keeping a gratitude journal and loving-kindness meditation.

I've been reading a lot of those Tony Robbins-type books lately so that's where I'm coming from.

Anchorite

@LD330 said

"Do you exercise or keep a healthy diet?

If you're trying to get your life together it might help to get the basics down first (assuming you don't already). Exercise, a healthy diet and meditation are keystone habits that will help all other endeavors in your life.

Other practices you might want to look into are keeping a gratitude journal and loving-kindness meditation.

I've been reading a lot of those Tony Robbins-type books lately so that's where I'm coming from."

Thanks for replying.

/edited personal history .
Edit. I've not tried loving meditation. Will give that a go.

Back to the original question if I may.
If in doing the preliminaries and find something is inhibiting growth I would think that the correct order of events is to deal with the negative side discovered first. And thus putting the body therapist on hold.
Here is my mediation on the working idea so far. I'm using this as my first template into practical ceremonial magick.

Any glaring corrections or any critique would be most helpful

Find the path or Sephira that is inhibiting growth - meditate on same.
Result - One idea is to reinforce the postive idea of that Path or the other idea is the exorcism of the negative of the same path.
So by process of elimination I could say that I was under the influence of Belial on Malkuth 'inertia, worthlessness, the most deadening influences of the Earth sphere'
This seems very accurate.

So to move forward I would either

Do nothing - continue with basic work and ignore the aphophic influences .
Exorcise the negative influences of Malkuth
3.Since it's related to Malkuth I could go with an elemental working of fire for energy and momentum.
attempt to align myself with the more Positive elements of Malkuth through basic elemental workings.
connect myself with a different planetary or Sephirotic energy such as Venus , a Path such as the Sun or work with the Guna's.

1.I could just could continue with the basic work and trust that momentum will build itself. Negatives to this include lack of practice in practical magick, lack of confronting shadow issues and time being a factor.
2.I think in this case I need a positive energetic flow, not more Banishing to create a vacuum that could be filled by another negative thought form.
3.I feel Elemental workings won't cover it even though I need practice at this- more energy from an element may unbalance the emotion and turn it into it's own shadow.
4. Noting Maat is related to Malkuth I could create a ceremony for her asking to balance the negative Malkuth energy with it's positive. Or attune myself soley to the positive by invoking Isis in her role as the Little Sister.
On the other hand Since the inertia is also a symbol of the Apophis stage I could work with Osiris who is also related to Malkuth.
5.Netzach or Venus could be used to bring some joy into a very 'chronic pain inertia' grey world.
I could use the Sun or Tipareth to re-invigorate the seeking of Osiris within. Hopefully healing and creating forward momentum.
Also noting that the problem seems to be my Will trapped by restriction between Rajas and Tamas, I could do an operation with Sattva/ Mercury to bring in fluidity and lightness.

Am I missing any glaringly obvious concepts or connections ? Critique of my basic ideas most welcome.

LD330

I didn't reply before because I don't know anything about chronic fatigue syndrome and can't really comment on that.

Are you able to have a social life? That's another non-magical thing that may help.

I recommend non-magical methods if you're trying to get your life in order because, from my own experience, magic ends up being a way to turn your back against the world. You get absorbed in yourself and rearranging all these details, but they don't have anything to do with reality.

But contact with other people is the most magical thing in existence. You don't get to hide from yourself in the face of other people.

But sometimes you just want to be alone and that's cool too.

Anchorite

@LD330 said

"I didn't reply before because I don't know anything about chronic fatigue syndrome and can't really comment on that.

Are you able to have a social life? That's another non-magical thing that may help.

I recommend non-magical methods if you're trying to get your life in order because, from my own experience, magic ends up being a way to turn your back against the world. You get absorbed in yourself and rearranging all these details, but they don't have anything to do with reality.

But contact with other people is the most magical thing in existence. You don't get to hide from yourself in the face of other people.

But sometimes you just want to be alone and that's cool too."

/*edit personal details.

I do see what you're saying and am bitterly aware of the dangers of fantasy. My first forays into magick rather than mysticism caused a lot of upheaval because of my lack of facing the way things are, or the movement of things rather.
However there is also the very valid Taoist way of isolation. Of course it doesn't have to last forever and I don't expect it to - however the magical ritual I want to do is actually give me the energy and health - or joy - or forward movement that basically a year in deep physical pain and mental exhaustion has repleted me of. Let alone the whole 18 years of this illness.
I feel it's fair to use magick powers here since I have done absolutely everything I can think of in the physical world of doctors, welfare, reliance on kind souls, therapy ad nauseum over the last 18 years to get this sorted. I bet many magicians wouldn't wait longer than a month of this!

Anchorite

Update on the 'too poor to not do it myself ' operation.
I decided to use symbols that I like and understand well, at this stage of development it would be best I think, rather than messing about with planetary or whatever exotic forces I decided on the four Kerubic elements as related to the Leary's interpersonal grid .

The Eagle (hostile strength) I have balanced, I can move in and out of this quarter fine. Hostile weakness - it's been worked on extensively in correlation to the friendly weakness with cbt and mindfulness so the Bull and the Angel are in hand so to speak. But the Lion? Friendly strength - that's the only one I basically have no experience of barring er Valium believe it or not. The famous love drug of the 90's just produced extreme fear in me due to the lack of the corresponding 'joy- everything can be wonderful' element in my psyche. So ego/I treated it as a hostile invader.
'I come in love! '
'It comes in love! Kill it!'

So anyway - using the middle pillar ritual charging method, bringing the force from Kether down to the throat and asking the angel to direct the energy. Tipareth charges the Lion image and Yesod inflames the imagination to see the new world view in the positive new reality.
Circle energy, throw it into a nice bar of chocolate , enjoy the chocolate as much as possible to experience the sensual joy.
Seems a simple ritual, that would use all the techniques I'm learning right now, directly pointed at the undoubted problem with appropriate force. Hopefully.
I'm on my third night of this practice and ... I feel deliciously languid. Like er, a big cat that has nothing to do right now .
Also noted negative temper issues/ irritations are being caught and transmuted before they are coming out of my mouth and once or twice half way through the negative thought itself. Much nicer to my long suffering girlfriend too.
Will keep this up for a few more days. There seems to no negative side effect apart from , again, a little too much energy to sleep and clogging up the threads here