Initial psychological results of LBRP
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@modernPrimitive said
"Greetings.
I'd like to find out opinions about whether it fairly common or normal for psychological complexes to come to the fore after daily practice of the LBRP. . I suppose it is a rather stupid question as it seems that during a "purification" process the "dirt" needs to come out - so I suppose I've answered that - however I would like some verification."
LBRP can have varied psychological effects depending on the individual and their inherent imbalances and biases. I had a student once stop dead in the middle of the final QC unable to move. Apparently, she had been possessed of such anxiety suddenly that she couldn't function for nearly 20 minutes afterward.
I think this is a sign of progress. Too many people start LBRP and notice absolutely nothing out of the ordinary. To get an effect is a start. To realize that it is not the intented effect and then address the issues and move forward is good magick.
" I had a slight "breakdown" which resulted in a diagnosis of anxiety disorder. My psychologist advised that I cease with all spiritual practices - which I'm now convinced might not have been the appropriate advice. "
One could use the word "breakdown".... of course, I don't know the details of what exactly happened... but breaking things down is an important part of the process which is often psychologically unpleasant. The path of spiritual practice is not always sunshine and roses. Speaking from personal experience, the greatest insights often come from the most intense ordeals.
"Of course the story is far more complex with many other life factors coming into play - I find myself very much a "head" person trying to figure this all out and analyze precisely what it is I have to overcome yet I tend to get lost in a sea of conflicting ideas."
Yes... the intellect is the most worthy of opponents, is it not? Analysis paralysis. I offer an analogy in the form of a recent conversation I had:
"So you're having this problem with the ritual?"
"Yes. I cannot proceed beyond a certain point without losing my balance and forgetting what I am doing."
"Why is this? Have you given any thought as to why it is that specific point."
"Yeah... it's all I've been thinking about, and I can't work it out."
"Do you know how to return a tennis serve?"
"What?!?"
"A tennis serve. Do you know how to hit a tennis ball?"
"Well sure."
"Okay... how, exactly?"
"I pick up the racket and hit the ball over the net."
"Okay. So how is that different than the ritual?"
"I know how hitting the tennis ball works."
"Do you? You know all the biomechanics involved in picking up the racket, its mass, the mass of the ball, how to calculate its position in space at any given time, the physics required to calculate the trajectory of the ball so that it clears the net. That's impressive."
"No no no... I don't know all that, I just know that when I hit the ball in such a way, it works."
"Okay... so my question is, why do you treat the ritual any differently?""What is the course forward? It feels that persistence with the LBRP is the only key to overcoming the problem though I can think of many other practices (such as affirmation, relaxation, exercise etc) that would assist."
Repeated attempts will, of course, be required... as in any learning process. Just don't expect different results from an identical process. As far as the other practices, a daily devotional exercise such as prayer or ritual invocation, and a daily exercise such as meditation or yoga can help ease some of the more difficult transition points quite significantly.
Cultivate fortitude and serenity. Have faith. Onward.
In L.V.X.
93/93
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@modernPrimitive said
"Accompanied with this anxiety is what feels like a release of energy from the solar plexus to the heart or from the heart to the throat when I find myself relaxing."
I too have anxiety problems that I deal with a lot. It usually manifests as worries about my physical health and well-being. Hypochondria, worries about the collapse of civilization, etc. Sometimes when my anxiety is particularly acute, I notice that it can manifest physically as a pain in my chest. A dull tension that can get pretty painful. In performing various relaxation exercises, I've been amazed to discover how much muscular tension I am actually carrying in the deep tissue of my chest and upper torso. I even noticed a correlation between my physical chest tension, my anxiety, social problems I have and an unwillingness to display certain emotions to others. The connection came from a voice inside me which suddenly said "You clamp shut your heart so tight that it hurts." I realized that this was both figuratively and literally a cause of these problems I experience. So relaxing my heart and opening it up to other people and experiences has become a primary task of mine.
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93,
Bryan wrote:
"I've been amazed to discover how much muscular tension I am actually carrying in the deep tissue of my chest and upper torso. I even noticed a correlation between my physical chest tension, my anxiety, social problems I have and an unwillingness to display certain emotions to others. "
I think many people if not most find physical tensions are held in the body. Some years ago, I realized I held my fear of what the world would do to me in my shoulders and neck area (Visuddha chakra). My fear of what I had to do in life produced tension in the Manipura and Svadisthana chakras. I've gradually released much of that, but it's hard to snap the habits of a lifetime.
That's just a personal experience - different people will find their energies are problematic in various ways, and are 'engraved' in the tissues differently.
I can't say how an LBRP would produce psychic distress. My guess- and it's just a guess - is that Modern Primitive is not actually feeling the inner stresses before banishing. I usually try to see what I'm 'carrying' or sensing in or around me before I start. That makes my banishing more effective.
However, I often notice those negative emotions or ideas <i>intensifying</i> as I start. I have to ride with this, and let the ritual take them away. It seems to be most effective when I actually have a sense of being overwhelmed at the start, and up until I start directing the Names at the pentagrams, because then the negative energies are more accessible to transformation.
Generally, occult work always stirs up the dark side in us, because that's what we are going to be transmuting. If we go in expecting that, then we're better prepared. But if this path is unsuitable, then it shouldn't be pursued to the point of continual distress.
93 93/93,
EM
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I give it a clear shot. You create with the ritual a lot of energy which makes you more anxious - in need to use that energy up.
Use a sitting asana and rythmic breathing (with easy mantra if you want to) to calm yourself i.e circulate the energy. Or other relaxation exercises. As Crowley mentions in Liber O you are advised to do asana, pranayama before doing any practices in it i.e. LBPR. Why? To clean nadis as to remove energy blocks.
Using your primary chakras for the first time actively can cause some disorders so cleaning nadis first is preferable. See Robert Bruce - Astral Dynamics for a review of disorders. -
Thanks all for the feedback. Very valuable.
I think I have figured part of the problem out.
The reason I started to do LBRP is that I seem to pick up a lot of bad psychic energy from my environment - especially my work environment which is highly stressful. An old friend in the OTO guided me through doing the LBRP properly (upon my request) as I haven't done it in 15 years. The results I think were caused by my expectation to seal myself off from my environment and hence I found myself "living in my head" and unable to live "in the moment". Last night I decided to relax a bit and have a few drinks with my wife and we ended up having a fabulous conversation (really connecting) and this seems to have eased my tension.
I also had a very strange dream with some bizarre symbolism like a dog vomiting up a fish and my aunt looking like a fat baby Buddha falling asleep in a bathtub and nearly drowning. Aside from those weird bits there was an partially empty pond (this is where the dog vomited up the fish). It was empty because my friend (the one who gave me advice on the LBRP) had messed with a regulator valve. I jiggled the valve and the pond started to fill up again. Now I'm no expert in symbolism but I would guess that the regulator valve has something to with the LBRP and the pond probably the "psyche" or emotional world.
Anyway, this is not a counseling forum for people to get psychological help but I do appreciate all the feeback.
Modest, I always thought one should do the LBRP before any meditation, just to create a clear space in which to meditate?
I'm keen on pursuing some devotional work perhaps, some chanting and the like. Does anyone think the middle pillar might help as well?
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@Aum418 said
"
If you have a problem with anxiety, the LBRP should technically help but it seems like it exacerbated the problem (althoug hti could be a false correlation). Did you 'cease all spiritual activities' like the psychologist asked, and if so did you see a difference?IAO131"
Hi Aum418,
Yes, I did cease all "spiritual work". I've spent the last 15 years working on my career and becoming an armchair philosopher. (since the passion remained). Recently I began to pursue spiritual studies once again. In a sense the psychologist's advice did help because I became focused on my external environment and had to develop confidence in my work (I was never a very confident person) - "balls to the wall" style. Now I run my own business so I have achieved a modicum of success in this. In a sense however it still feels like I'm harbouring a lack of true self-confidence, in other words the self-confidence that I have developed has been slapped ontop of an underlying complex. I think I tend to get a bit edgy when I become introspective. More on this when I respond to bryan in the next post.
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@bryan said
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@modernPrimitive said
"Accompanied with this anxiety is what feels like a release of energy from the solar plexus to the heart or from the heart to the throat when I find myself relaxing."I too have anxiety problems that I deal with a lot. It usually manifests as worries about my physical health and well-being. Hypochondria, worries about the collapse of civilization, etc. Sometimes when my anxiety is particularly acute, I notice that it can manifest physically as a pain in my chest. A dull tension that can get pretty painful. In performing various relaxation exercises, I've been amazed to discover how much muscular tension I am actually carrying in the deep tissue of my chest and upper torso. I even noticed a correlation between my physical chest tension, my anxiety, social problems I have and an unwillingness to display certain emotions to others. The connection came from a voice inside me which suddenly said "You clamp shut your heart so tight that it hurts." I realized that this was both figuratively and literally a cause of these problems I experience. So relaxing my heart and opening it up to other people and experiences has become a primary task of mine."
hehe....I have had similar problems - health concerns etc. The worst is when you're doing a visualization on the body and you see black areas - then you suddenly get paranoid!
I did read somewhere about a "feedback-loop" - in other words a sort of circularly maintained self-suggestion - and I think it could be applicable to this kind of situation. I've found for example that after several days of relaxation (like on vacation) I become aware of the level of remaining physical tension which to my surprise is incredibly "deep" especially around the neck and shoulders. It then becomes almost impossible to remove this tension and I then seem to become more tensed up which I think is due to the awareness of that tension ("Damnit why can't I relax!")
I suppose a possible solution is to actually just "action" all of those paranoia - start getting some exercise, eat healthy, go for regular de-stress massages or slef-massage, relaxation and then try and maintain the mindset to just "let go" so as to break the feedback-loop. The thing is that even when my body is stressed, if I'm say swimming with my kids then I don't notice it and then when I'm on a relaxation mission I sort of become obsessed with relaxing and then I can't do it unless I really sleep a hell of a lot, go for massages - really take dramatic action against the problem.
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Yes, one does LBPR to harmonize oneself i.e chakras and the place around you gets charged because of your aura expanding because of the chakras - to my limited exp. It's a psi chi, ki, reiki, prana exercise. Of course it helps in meditation if your nadis are clean enough to feel its positive effect. As I said before, trying to use the primary chakras for the first time actively can cause various disorders because of the various blocks present in the body. That's why some people do pranayama, Robert Bruce has other means etc.
I see what you write and that concludes that you need to learn to relax first. The methods I described or any of your methods are good.
For me alcohol is not an answer. It's a fast temporary way to get away from stress. Try to massage eatch other with nice smelling oils or massage honey - that relaxes a lot, is sexy and provides a good time to negotiate things. -
@modernPrimitive said
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@Aum418 said
"
If you have a problem with anxiety, the LBRP should technically help but it seems like it exacerbated the problem (althoug hti could be a false correlation). Did you 'cease all spiritual activities' like the psychologist asked, and if so did you see a difference?IAO131"
Hi Aum418,
Yes, I did cease all "spiritual work". I've spent the last 15 years working on my career and becoming an armchair philosopher. (since the passion remained). Recently I began to pursue spiritual studies once again. In a sense the psychologist's advice did help because I became focused on my external environment and had to develop confidence in my work (I was never a very confident person) - "balls to the wall" style. Now I run my own business so I have achieved a modicum of success in this. In a sense however it still feels like I'm harbouring a lack of true self-confidence, in other words the self-confidence that I have developed has been slapped ontop of an underlying complex. I think I tend to get a bit edgy when I become introspective. More on this when I respond to bryan in the next post."
93,
Get a massage and take an entheogen
IAO131
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Aum418 surprised me. It would be an interesting topic about entheogens in healing rituals. Especially how exactly do they heal.
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@Modes said
"Aum418 surprised me. It would be an interesting topic about entheogens in healing rituals. Especially how exactly do they heal."
I would say their energization of the limbic system so one obtains a heightened emotional sensitivity (which can be a bad thing). I dont know though, its probably extremely complicated (physiologically).
IAO131
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@Aum418 said
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@modernPrimitive said
"
@Aum418 said
"
If you have a problem with anxiety, the LBRP should technically help but it seems like it exacerbated the problem (althoug hti could be a false correlation). Did you 'cease all spiritual activities' like the psychologist asked, and if so did you see a difference?IAO131"
Hi Aum418,
Yes, I did cease all "spiritual work". I've spent the last 15 years working on my career and becoming an armchair philosopher. (since the passion remained). Recently I began to pursue spiritual studies once again. In a sense the psychologist's advice did help because I became focused on my external environment and had to develop confidence in my work (I was never a very confident person) - "balls to the wall" style. Now I run my own business so I have achieved a modicum of success in this. In a sense however it still feels like I'm harbouring a lack of true self-confidence, in other words the self-confidence that I have developed has been slapped ontop of an underlying complex. I think I tend to get a bit edgy when I become introspective. More on this when I respond to bryan in the next post."
93,
Get a massage and take an entheogen
IAO131"
Are u being serious or just screwing with me? (had to look up "entheogen")
Funnily enough while I've never been keen on drugs the odd time that I've smoked a joint I've tended to get pretty paranoid; one time was particularly terrifying as I thought I was dying. Acid though has never made me paranoid - I can sort of handle hallucinating, it's only when there's a bad physiological effect that I get para - dope tends to elevate my heart rate pretty dramatically.
Started doing exercise tonight for the first time in about 10 years - definitely feel more relaxed though I probably won't be able to walk for a week.
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@Modes said
"Yes, one does LBPR to harmonize oneself i.e chakras and the place around you gets charged because of your aura expanding because of the chakras - to my limited exp. It's a psi chi, ki, reiki, prana exercise. Of course it helps in meditation if your nadis are clean enough to feel its positive effect. As I said before, trying to use the primary chakras for the first time actively can cause various disorders because of the various blocks present in the body. That's why some people do pranayama, Robert Bruce has other means etc.
I see what you write and that concludes that you need to learn to relax first. The methods I described or any of your methods are good.
For me alcohol is not an answer. It's a fast temporary way to get away from stress. Try to massage eatch other with nice smelling oils or massage honey - that relaxes a lot, is sexy and provides a good time to negotiate things. "Modest, what sort of asana and pranayama practice would you suggest? Duration, number of breaths etc etc?
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Your favorite sitting asana. Just be sure to do it right. A yogi in your area may help. Cross legged asana is no good. For pranayama see Liber RV vel Spiritus. Counting in/out breaths till 10; in only; out only - a begginers practise in Zen.
I was talking about mushrooms. I have read that the experience is like prana, reiki, ki etc etc healing and you can feel it. Better leave that kind of discussion to entheogen forums. -
@modernPrimitive said
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@Aum418 said
"
@modernPrimitive said
"
@Aum418 said
"
If you have a problem with anxiety, the LBRP should technically help but it seems like it exacerbated the problem (althoug hti could be a false correlation). Did you 'cease all spiritual activities' like the psychologist asked, and if so did you see a difference?IAO131"
Hi Aum418,
Yes, I did cease all "spiritual work". I've spent the last 15 years working on my career and becoming an armchair philosopher. (since the passion remained). Recently I began to pursue spiritual studies once again. In a sense the psychologist's advice did help because I became focused on my external environment and had to develop confidence in my work (I was never a very confident person) - "balls to the wall" style. Now I run my own business so I have achieved a modicum of success in this. In a sense however it still feels like I'm harbouring a lack of true self-confidence, in other words the self-confidence that I have developed has been slapped ontop of an underlying complex. I think I tend to get a bit edgy when I become introspective. More on this when I respond to bryan in the next post."
93,
Get a massage and take an entheogen
IAO131"
Are u being serious or just screwing with me? (had to look up "entheogen")
Funnily enough while I've never been keen on drugs the odd time that I've smoked a joint I've tended to get pretty paranoid; one time was particularly terrifying as I thought I was dying. Acid though has never made me paranoid - I can sort of handle hallucinating, it's only when there's a bad physiological effect that I get para - dope tends to elevate my heart rate pretty dramatically.
Started doing exercise tonight for the first time in about 10 years - definitely feel more relaxed though I probably won't be able to walk for a week."
Not really. LSD had some interesting studies on it before it was outlawed (for example it had one of the highest success rates of curing alcoholism in a study) and drugs like MDMA can often help people work through emotional issues. That being said, the set and setting can drastically change the course and effects of these drugs and you cannot be sure it will be beneficial unless you are really ready for it, have a good setting, etc. A common effect of LSD and Psilocybin (among others) is that it causes giggling and other emotional releases (catharsis) that can be helpful. Not that Im endorsing use of illegal substances...
Get some exercise, get a massage, eat some good healthy food, and try ot enjoy the little things. Hell, try a different psychologist... Its all so variable
IAO131
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@Modes said
"Your favorite sitting asana. Just be sure to do it right. A yogi in your area may help. Cross legged asana is no good. For pranayama see Liber RV vel Spiritus. Counting in/out breaths till 10; in only; out only - a begginers practise in Zen.
I was talking about mushrooms. I have read that the experience is like prana, reiki, ki etc etc healing and you can feel it. Better leave that kind of discussion to entheogen forums."Thanks Modest,
I'm going to be learning some asana and pranayama from a yoga practitioner on your advice - just to make sure I'm doing it correctly. I think it's like martial arts - you can't really learn these kinds of thing properly from a book. I read Liber E as well - slightly different from the pranayama that I've been taught (in through left, then hold, then out through right and then you reverse this, in through right etc). Also some crazy ideas in there about doing pranayama with different gasses!
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@Aum418 said
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@modernPrimitive said
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@Aum418 said
"
@modernPrimitive said
"
@Aum418 said
"
If you have a problem with anxiety, the LBRP should technically help but it seems like it exacerbated the problem (althoug hti could be a false correlation). Did you 'cease all spiritual activities' like the psychologist asked, and if so did you see a difference?IAO131"
Hi Aum418,
Yes, I did cease all "spiritual work". I've spent the last 15 years working on my career and becoming an armchair philosopher. (since the passion remained). Recently I began to pursue spiritual studies once again. In a sense the psychologist's advice did help because I became focused on my external environment and had to develop confidence in my work (I was never a very confident person) - "balls to the wall" style. Now I run my own business so I have achieved a modicum of success in this. In a sense however it still feels like I'm harbouring a lack of true self-confidence, in other words the self-confidence that I have developed has been slapped ontop of an underlying complex. I think I tend to get a bit edgy when I become introspective. More on this when I respond to bryan in the next post."
93,
Get a massage and take an entheogen
IAO131"
Are u being serious or just screwing with me? (had to look up "entheogen")
Funnily enough while I've never been keen on drugs the odd time that I've smoked a joint I've tended to get pretty paranoid; one time was particularly terrifying as I thought I was dying. Acid though has never made me paranoid - I can sort of handle hallucinating, it's only when there's a bad physiological effect that I get para - dope tends to elevate my heart rate pretty dramatically.
Started doing exercise tonight for the first time in about 10 years - definitely feel more relaxed though I probably won't be able to walk for a week."
Not really. LSD had some interesting studies on it before it was outlawed (for example it had one of the highest success rates of curing alcoholism in a study) and drugs like MDMA can often help people work through emotional issues. That being said, the set and setting can drastically change the course and effects of these drugs and you cannot be sure it will be beneficial unless you are really ready for it, have a good setting, etc. A common effect of LSD and Psilocybin (among others) is that it causes giggling and other emotional releases (catharsis) that can be helpful. Not that Im endorsing use of illegal substances...
Get some exercise, get a massage, eat some good healthy food, and try ot enjoy the little things. Hell, try a different psychologist... Its all so variable
IAO131"
I must admit I'm somewhat of a control freak - "loosing control" (or at least the illusion thereof) seems to send me into a panic. Something I will have to learn to overcome of course.
As for the rest of the advice that is exactly what I've been working towards. Had my first MuayThai lessons this week and my body is "broken" but I can feel a much greater level of relaxation as though 15 years of stress is starting to melt away. I wonder if "knots" and muscle tightness don't cause the apprent blockages in the meridians. I'm currently reading Deepak Chopra's Quantum Healing and according to Ayurveda it's as though the meridians are literally the channel whereby the unconscious mind interacts with the body (hence the need to alleviate these blockages). It's a two-way thing - you need to get the body in good working order to have a "healthy mind" just as much as "healthy thoughts" will create a healthy body.
Anyway thanks for all the advice.
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@modernPrimitive said
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@Aum418 said
"
@modernPrimitive said
"
@Aum418 said
"
@modernPrimitive said
"
@Aum418 said
"
If you have a problem with anxiety, the LBRP should technically help but it seems like it exacerbated the problem (althoug hti could be a false correlation). Did you 'cease all spiritual activities' like the psychologist asked, and if so did you see a difference?IAO131"
Hi Aum418,
Yes, I did cease all "spiritual work". I've spent the last 15 years working on my career and becoming an armchair philosopher. (since the passion remained). Recently I began to pursue spiritual studies once again. In a sense the psychologist's advice did help because I became focused on my external environment and had to develop confidence in my work (I was never a very confident person) - "balls to the wall" style. Now I run my own business so I have achieved a modicum of success in this. In a sense however it still feels like I'm harbouring a lack of true self-confidence, in other words the self-confidence that I have developed has been slapped ontop of an underlying complex. I think I tend to get a bit edgy when I become introspective. More on this when I respond to bryan in the next post."
93,
Get a massage and take an entheogen
IAO131"
Are u being serious or just screwing with me? (had to look up "entheogen")
Funnily enough while I've never been keen on drugs the odd time that I've smoked a joint I've tended to get pretty paranoid; one time was particularly terrifying as I thought I was dying. Acid though has never made me paranoid - I can sort of handle hallucinating, it's only when there's a bad physiological effect that I get para - dope tends to elevate my heart rate pretty dramatically.
Started doing exercise tonight for the first time in about 10 years - definitely feel more relaxed though I probably won't be able to walk for a week."
Not really. LSD had some interesting studies on it before it was outlawed (for example it had one of the highest success rates of curing alcoholism in a study) and drugs like MDMA can often help people work through emotional issues. That being said, the set and setting can drastically change the course and effects of these drugs and you cannot be sure it will be beneficial unless you are really ready for it, have a good setting, etc. A common effect of LSD and Psilocybin (among others) is that it causes giggling and other emotional releases (catharsis) that can be helpful. Not that Im endorsing use of illegal substances...
Get some exercise, get a massage, eat some good healthy food, and try ot enjoy the little things. Hell, try a different psychologist... Its all so variable
IAO131"
I must admit I'm somewhat of a control freak - "loosing control" (or at least the illusion thereof) seems to send me into a panic. Something I will have to learn to overcome of course."
Perhaps the overwhelming desire to always be in control is leading to stress...
"As for the rest of the advice that is exactly what I've been working towards. Had my first MuayThai lessons this week and my body is "broken" but I can feel a much greater level of relaxation as though 15 years of stress is starting to melt away. I wonder if "knots" and muscle tightness don't cause the apprent blockages in the meridians. I'm currently reading Deepak Chopra's Quantum Healing and according to Ayurveda it's as though the meridians are literally the channel whereby the unconscious mind interacts with the body (hence the need to alleviate these blockages)."
Meridians sound like superstition to me...
"It's a two-way thing - you need to get the body in good working order to have a "healthy mind" just as much as "healthy thoughts" will create a healthy body."
Yup.
IAO131
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93 modernPrimitive,
Isreal Regardie mentions in a few of his books that it is good for a student to undergo some counseling before starting the Work. He said the Work would unlock all kinds of deep energies, and that any existing issues would only be amplified by them. Personally having always been quite insane I decided to skip that step as it seemed a waste of time.
The significant effects I noticed were around being able to hold all of the imagery and dynamics together at one time. Meaning toward the end, you've got columns of light, pentacles, angels, hexagrams, and all sorts of stuff happening at once. This is good overall to increase a number of abilities. I think it somehow synchronizes the right and left hemispheres of the brain and increases the frequency of both. The other is that there is part of the subconscious probably related to the old reptilian brain that somehow understands or even remembers parts of the operation. I found it is not just a bundle of firing physiological survival impulses which controls breathing, heart, etc, but is an integral part of consciousness. I don't know if it is the thoughts, the vibrations, or what, but when it 'wakes up' and you become aware of it, for me it was a pretty significant 'psychological event'...but in a very good way.
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@Aum418 said
"Meridians sound like superstition to me..."
I've always been very skeptical of acupuncture, reflexology and the likes but I think there might be something to it. If you apply pressure to certain points on the body where there is physical tension (knots in the muscle) then you'll often find a pain that an supposed unrelated area of the body begins to manifest - like pushing a sore spot on the foot an you start to get a shooting pain in the neck or down the arm. I haven't ever checked if these correlate with actual meridians though they do seem to correlate with part of the Qigong breathing circulations - specifically from the shoulders and neck down through the arms.
I think meridians could either be a primitive understanding of the nervous system or they have to do with how our muscle groups and organs relate to one another through posture or movement etc. Getting rid of the tension in the muscles supposedly allows prana / chi to flow more effectively through the body. I think there is something to it, but like I said I haven't done enough investigation yet.