December 13-15, 2011: 5 of Wands
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Five of Wands
STRIFEMeditation Pattern: Place Atu XXI, The Universe, and Atu XI, Lust, side-by-side, with the 5 of Wands above them.
Traditional Description: Five wands or torches. One is upright in the middle; the others cross each other in two pairs. Flames leap from the point of junction. Above the middle wand is the sign of Saturn, and below is that of Leo, thus representing the decanate.
Geburah of Fire: Quarreling, fighting, competition, violence, disturbance. Boldness, rashness, lust, desire, prodigality. Sudden and violent outburst of energy. Volcanic energy. A wholly active force.
Saturn/Leo: Condescension and cruelty, or patronage and generosity â depending on whether the card is well or ill-dignified â yet in any case with domination and arrogance of station.
Mars + Saturn: Struggle, strife, violent or destructive expression of energy; hardness, endurance, obstinacy, self-interest. Injury, pain, conflict.
http://www.mysticfamiliar.com/archive/divination_with_cards/images_tarot_angel_cards/2wandstho2.JPG
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Reality roars...
The energy of it makes me feel like sarcastically ripping someone a new one.
Makes me think of Stephen Colbert.
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Actually, upon reflection... It makes me think of firey prophetic passages in the Hebrew Scriptures.
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I'm glad today's the last day. I keep noticing that "**** THIS!" response in myself.
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It has long seemed to me that all the 5s are expressions (in their respective elements) of "Severity of condition, requireing Strength." With the 5 of Wands, we would expect this to be "Severity in the area of Will... requiring Strength of Will."
But what does that mean exactly? I found inspiration for this answer, decades ago, in Waite's version of the card: a battle in which everyone fighting has a staff (a wand), and these are in a tangle pointed every which way. It's a splendid representation of "conflict of will" - of many individual will-elements, wielded by many little voices in us (each having its own agenda), pointing in many different ways.
Will needs to be singular. And will is sacred when pure (unpolluted). Therefore, just about the only severity or conflict in will that can exist is in the case of true division or conflict of will - a "will divided."
And this requires Strength as the solution - in this case, the Strength that forges singularity of purpose and that responds to singular will from within - the Volition characteristic of Geburah.
Additionally, this is one of only two cards having both Mars and Saturn characterizing it. The other is the 3 of Disks. In that case, though, (1) we're dealing with a 3, i.e., a Supernal idea, and (2) it is the Mars decanate of Capricorn, and both Saturn and Mars are dignified in Capricorn. We would tend to expect the most positive outcome of their combkined "struggle" nature possible. OTOH, this card is the Saturn decanate of Leo, a sign in which Saturn is debilited. Therefore, we would usually expect the worst form of the energy. The comparison of those two cards is quite revealing.
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At the outset of working with this card I was expecting to have a bunch of fights with people. But upon working with it what I discovered was this strife was internal, and as Jim pointed out, the root of it all stems from a division of Will. My experience of this energy began as a sharp "cutting off" and distancing myself from people and commitments that were not a priority, followed by the need to withdraw into myself and examine of what's really important to ME. What do IIII really care about? What's the one thing that IIIII REALLY want to do with my life and why am IIII not doing it???
Next I started to confront the answers to those questions. Without sugar coating stuff. This took something. It took a "no time or room for bullshit" approach and a lot of honesty.I can't even recall a time when I this "on edge" and straight up honest with people.
What I took away from this little self inquiry is that I want to make art. At my deepest core I am an artist and I have put this artistic side of myself on the back burner. This Will to create Art is expressing itself as the desire to make collages, film stuff, take pictures of stuff and combine all of the above some how. There's also a desire to express myself through clothing (which makes me think of the original definition of Kosmos - a woman's make up). All of this is going on inside of me and I'm under the false belief that I have no way to get it out. But that's bullshit. I'm just scared and I keep telling myself that I'm too old and too inexperienced to start expressing what's coming through from my inner core. I feel like a pipe ready to burst! LOL And I think that's what's really at the core this Mars/Saturn/Leo arrangement.
It can get a little extreme. We can get on our high horse and piss some people off. We can bitch and moan about having to get our shit straight. But at the end of the day it's on us to get with the program.
IAOMAI, you mentioned a few things that really resonated with me. One of them was the need to sarcastically rip new assholes, the second was a ""**** THIS!" response in yourself. I invite you to direct that "**** THIS!!" energy toward the things that you know in your heart of hearts have no business in your inner and outer life.
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@Jim Eshelman said
"
Will needs to be singular. And will is sacred when pure (unpolluted). Therefore, just about the only severity or conflict in will that can exist is in the case of true division or conflict of will - a "will divided."And this requires Strength as the solution - in this case, the Strength that forges singularity of purpose and that responds to singular will from within - the Volition characteristic of Geburah.
Additionally, this is one of only two cards having both Mars and Saturn characterizing it. The other is the 3 of Disks. In that case, though, (1) we're dealing with a 3, i.e., a Supernal idea, and (2) it is the Mars decanate of Capricorn, and both Saturn and Mars are dignified in Capricorn. We would tend to expect the most positive outcome of their combkined "struggle" nature possible. OTOH, this card is the Saturn decanate of Leo, a sign in which Saturn is debilited. Therefore, we would usually expect the worst form of the energy. The comparison of those two cards is quite revealing."
These words are golden... Thank you Jim. I re-read this post numerous times and the words kept coming back to my mind as i observed the two female figures (of Atu XXI and XI ) mirroring each other, with the 5oW above them... Once again, thank you so much!