Sex Magick Question
-
Today I received Michael Kraig's Modern Sex Magick. My question is on the ejaculatory excercises. He explains to masturbate up to the point of blowing your load, but stopping right before, with continual practice, pushing your limits further and further. If I cannot ejaculate during that time of practice, when do I? Trust me, blue-balls is not something I want to be stuck with.
-
You're in luck! Blue balls is a medical fiction. You don't get physically damaged from semen build-up.
-
I had them once (cramping, pain, after a day of unreleased excitation following extending celibacy), but there's no physical damage, and I never got it from any sort of sex magick practice.
With taoist techniques and similar practices, your moving the energy up as you do it, so you don't end up in pain of any kind.
-
Good, no such thing as blueballs, except for the cramping, pain and what. So still, is their any particular procedure, or should I go as far as I can, then release? Thats what I'm guessing, since neither of you directly answered my question
. Any tips on prolonging masturbation then? I know about the perinium and applying pressure. Keep in mind im asking in purely a magickal technique sense, not in any other perverse or whatever manner. What about you Jim? You've had to have some Sex Magick experience, right? -
@Alias55A said
"Good, no such thing as blueballs, except for the cramping, pain and what. So still, is their any particular procedure, or should I go as far as I can, then release? Thats what I'm guessing, since neither of you directly answered my question
."What does Don recommend in the book? (I know and respect him but, actually, I've never read that particular book. I didn't give a direct answer before because you're electing to follow a specific regimen that I haven't read.)
"Any tips on prolonging masturbation then? I know about the perinium and applying pressure. Keep in mind im asking in purely a magical technique sense, not in any other perverse or whatever manner.]/quote]
Usual techniques (back from when I was teaching practical adult sensuality-sexuality classes in the '70s) involves a technique called "peaking." It basically requires two things. The first is that you become increasingly aware of the point of ejaculatory inevitability, i.e., the point where there's no stopping it. In the context of increasing your mindfulness of this, the technique is to bring yourself as close as you can with crossing that line, then to back off and let things subside, then start it up again; and to see how many cycles of this you can have.In the course of general adult sexuality training, the eventual technique is to do this several times (half a dozen cycles is good for most people), then let it blow (and blow your mind in the process). According to your description of the method, you would leave out the last step.
This is all assisted BTW by witnessing the relationship of breath to your arousal, and particularly to letting the breath calm quite a lot between cycles.
"What about you Jim? You've had to have some Sex Magick experience, right?"
"Sure. (Though it doesn't necessarily mean anything in particular, I could mention that, at the time of my resignation from O.T.O. I held the IX°.) But, as mentioned above, I didn't want to step in and interfere with your use of a specific training program - when I haven't read the particulars of that program.
But (as a way of answering your last question), I tend to organize the training steps as I know it into three phases, which are essentially Purification, Consecration, and Consummation. The masturbation exercises you are describing tend to be warm-ups for the second phase, Consecration. But before this comes a phase of Purification, which would have helped you handle the problem you are raising. Without turning this answer into a paper on the subject, and knowing that I'm leaving stuff out, here are the chief points (incorporating things learned from various systems combined with personal experience):
The Purification stage has physiological and psychological elements. The main goal of the psychological aspect is to clear from yourself most of the wrong messages about sexuality that most people carry into adulthood, particularly any equation of it to shame, or any emotional over-compensations to messages about shame. The physiological elements usually start with a discipline of a prolonged period of what outwardly looks like celibacy, but must not include repression. It is what one system calls "chastity, both within and without." It includes not only a commitment to no sexual activity for a period, but a commitment to not replacing it with psychological substitutes such as endorphin-pumping sexual fantasies as an alternative. But it is quite important to not repress any urges, sensations, thoughts, etc., just to appreciate them in a new way. Depending on the system, this may include breathing exercises, or quasi-bhakti practices of devoting those energies to a religious object, or techniques of letting the energies rise from the lower chakras when it overflows and gradually relax and open the higher ones, or just psychological decisions about "don't have to do anything about it." (One student "got" this idea when I suggested that having an erection felt good all by itself; one didn't necessarily have to do something else just because an erection appeared.) One must, especially, continue to feel the feelings (physical and emotional) that come with arousal, without blocking them, dismissing them, removing them, or being compelled to do anything about them other than feel them. The right attitude, eventually, should be a life more frequently saturated with pleasure where one neither feels compelled to sexual activity (on any plane) nor has any avoidance of it. One simply chooses not to have it, while feeling all the feelings and letting all the energies move through you.
How long for this phase? Certainly no less than one month. Some systems put an arbitrary figure, such as six months (which, so far, has seemed sufficient for every case known to me personally). But the real answer isn't in a time frame. Rather, it's in detecting when the alchemy has been completed and the above stage is reached (and then going a little longer to make sure).
When the stage of Purification has been accomplished, one is then in a new state, able to approach the sexual energies in an entirely different way: At which point the Consecration by Fire can be begun.
-
So Jim, when will you be writing your book on sex magic? We could really use a level headed authority on the subject. Plus another well made book for my collection would be nice.
-
@TheSilent1 said
"So Jim, when will you be writing your book on sex magic? We could really use a level headed authority on the subject. Plus another well made book for my collection would be nice.
"I don't plan on it
In fact, I haven't even written msot of the instruction for Temple of Thelema's Second Order on the subject - it's mostly oral instruction. (Yeah, yeah, I know, "oral sex instruction." Live it up.
)(The preliminary First Order instructions are in place.)
OTOH, there will be "another well made book for [your] collection" available around January (that's an estimate, not a commitment). I just finished the first pass on rewriting 400+ pages, and have gotten it content-complete (I've said what I want to say); but not I need to do the much slower rewrite of making it comprehension-complete (understandable by the typical expected reader).
-
@TheSilent1 said
"So Jim, when will you be writing your book on sex magic? We could really use a level headed authority on the subject. Plus another well made book for my collection would be nice.
"A few additional thoughts on your remarks, arising form a decade or two of thinking about such writing...
The issue with writing a general work on sex magick is that sexuality is enormously complex. There are few areas where individual choice and taste are so diverse. This (among other things) means that anything recommending or pushing particular techniques is almost certain to look ridiculous to a lot of people. Individual diversity in sexuality is not only broad, but is a constantly moving target. It's also intimately connected to, well, intimacy - it interwines with both individual and societal moral standards, reaches its tendrils down to the deepest levels of our psyches, is almost inseparably related to our biology at the levels hardest to separate because entire species survival depends on it, and yet reflects, as no other human experience reflects, some of the most sublime spiritual states.
In short: It ain't easy! Any really comprehensive book would be impossible IMHO, and any substantially comprehensive book would have to address most important realms of human experience, while acknowledging that there are few cases of "one rule fits all."
But it does appear that it can be broken into a preliminary "I just want to incorporate this into my life a bit" forms of worship, and a three-step training for the advanced work.
In brief, the preliminary I just mentioned is encoded in the "unto Nuit" perspective: Increase your appeciation of all things of sense without being ruled by them, and consciously, mindfully recognize each of them, in the course of enjoying them, as acts of worship: that is, be mindful of Nuit and what you are contributing to Her by your enjoyment.
The more advanced, formal program mostly breaks into three phases, and one must definitely understand it as a training program rather than a way of life; because there are things in the course of training that are unnatural. They are done for a particular purpose in the course of the training.
As mentioned before, these can be summarized as Purification, Consecration, and Consummation.
The Purification stage was described pretty well above, I think.
The Consecration stage can only really be undertaken after the results of the Purification stage are attained. Consecration is by Fire, and this stage involves the mindful, intentional use of the sexual energies. Many people characterize this as a distinctly onanistic phase, but that's irrelevant: It involves the knowing, prolonged use of the purified force, each alone or with a partner [LOL, gives a new meaning to the "solitary vs. group practitioner" debate!]. It contains both training in prolongation and restraint, and training in releasing the force under will, and combined with highly directed will.
The Consummation is a stage beyond these, and is more difficult to discuss with people who have not attained some success in the first two. It is intimate beyond all measure, and, as one writer characterized it, incorprates the divine as an equal participant in the union of two, involving them directly as co-creators of reality. (Yes, it's a big deal.)
Obscure note to Temple of Thelema members: The root ideas of all of this are pretty obvious in the 1° ceremony if you stop and look for them. The essential principles are declared more openly in the 2° ceremony (and it is teachings from the 2° that form the basis of the 5° instruction in Purification). An important and delicious technique, with quite explicit instructions, is the reward of success in the main practical work of the 3° (and is the basis of the training in Consummation given in the 7°). A very practical paper in the 4° is just about as specific as one can get (and is an important basis of the Consecration training in the 6°).
-
@Jim Eshelman said
"OTOH, there will be "another well made book for [your] collection" available around January (that's an estimate, not a commitment). I just finished the first pass on rewriting 400+ pages, and have gotten it content-complete (I've said what I want to say); but not I need to do the much slower rewrite of making it comprehension-complete (understandable by the typical expected reader)."
Well that's just a teaser...what will be the subject of this new book? You can count me as a fan of your previous works.
-
@kuniggety said
"
@Jim Eshelman said
"OTOH, there will be "another well made book for [your] collection" available around January (that's an estimate, not a commitment). I just finished the first pass on rewriting 400+ pages, and have gotten it content-complete (I've said what I want to say); but not I need to do the much slower rewrite of making it comprehension-complete (understandable by the typical expected reader)."Well that's just a teaser...what will be the subject of this new book? You can count me as a fan of your previous works."
Well, yes it is a teaser
Subject confidential until it's nearly finished. Thanks for the good words. Preliminary feedback (from the few people that have seen it) is that the new book will very interesting and, in any case, it's practically an initiation writing it. The challenge now, as mentioned above, is making it comprehension-complete (e.g., I've actually started a Glossary on this one).
-
@Jim Eshelman said
"
@kuniggety said
"
@Jim Eshelman said
"OTOH, there will be "another well made book for [your] collection" available around January (that's an estimate, not a commitment). I just finished the first pass on rewriting 400+ pages, and have gotten it content-complete (I've said what I want to say); but not I need to do the much slower rewrite of making it comprehension-complete (understandable by the typical expected reader)."Well that's just a teaser...what will be the subject of this new book? You can count me as a fan of your previous works."
Well, yes it is a teaser
Subject confidential until it's nearly finished. Thanks for the good words. Preliminary feedback (from the few people that have seen it) is that the new book will very interesting and, in any case, it's practically an initiation writing it. The challenge now, as mentioned above, is making it comprehension-complete (e.g., I've actually started a Glossary on this one)."
I have to point out something, you said "it's practically an initiation writing it. I'm not trying to pry, for that might mean something confidential or all together person you dont want to share. Any case, would this have to do with a grade? Like some of the books and other writings that came from initiates completing a higher grade? Oh and thank you for the tips on the subject, and you should write a book about it. I think the only way you could trully accomplish the writing would be to put an eclectic view with lots of options pointing to a general initiatory kind of system kinda thingy
. Just an idea, 
-
@Alias55A said
"I have to point out something, you said "it's practically an initiation writing it. I'm not trying to pry, for that might mean something confidential or all together person you dont want to share. Any case, would this have to do with a grade? Like some of the books and other writings that came from initiates completing a higher grade?"
It's not a writing for a specific (outward) completion of a grade assignment, no. (Thanks for your delicacy in asking.) It does, however, appear (subjectively) to be taking me much deeper into fulfillment of the primary tasks of my current grade, yes. - Sometimes specific (universal) tasks take particular (individual) forms as part of working through them.
My personal formula has always flourished best in the course of teaching. In abstract terms, my Will is intiamtely connected to teaching; more concretely, I simply don't stop and ask myself the scope or depth of questions others ask me (or that I ask in anticipation of their needs). When I had to select my Probationer motto way back at the beginning, I asked myself, "OK, so who are you and what do you do?" I realized that "what I do" is "I learn shit, and then teach it to someone else," so I picked Disco et Instruo ("I Learn & I Teach") as my Probationer motto. That changed and evolved over time, of course, but it's noticeable how many successor mottoes have expressed substantially the same theme. (I also was rather taken with the initials, D.E.I., Latin for "Unto God." It was decades before I realized that this was not only the motto at the beginning of my current incarnation's Work, but was the "next logical successor" to the motto I last bore in my last incarnation.)
So... using writing as a way of "pulling stuff through" has long been central to my method.
"Oh and thank you for the tips on the subject, and you should write a book about it. I think the only way you could trully accomplish the writing would be to put an eclectic view with lots of options pointing to a general initiatory kind of system kinda thingy
. Just an idea, "Thanks for the encouragement. I doubt that I'll get to that in this life, but one never knows. No plans for it at the present.