Bornless Ritual notes and question...
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I'm fast approaching the forty day mark in my daily performance of the Bornless Ritual. I do the LBRP, LBRH, Middle Pillar, Body of Light exercise, and the Bornless Ritual twice a day plus a tarot meditation based on the paths.
It has been interesting so far.
My only question and concern is that I thought the ritual was one of union.
Lately, the being I become in the Bornless Ritual feels like it is more and more becoming a distinct persona.
In other words, instead of feeling like I am becoming more like the 'Bornless One', the opposite seems to be happening. When I do the Bornless Ritual, I become what feels like a distinct being with a different sense of self and the world then I normally have. I was expecting to remove distinctions but instead I seem to be strengthening the 'Bornless One' personality distinction with each ritual.
Should I try to ignore or brush away this sense of distinction? It bothers me because it starts to feel as if the 'Bornless One' is a different person that I am creating within my microcosm that has it's own microcosm....
I don't feel any benefits from the Bornless Ritual yet (other than as the Bornless One, I made a couple of statements and then they actually happened), but will continue the operation for the time being. -
@Mahanta70 said
"My only question and concern is that I thought the ritual was one of union."
It is.
"Lately, the being I become in the Bornless Ritual feels like it is more and more becoming a distinct persona."
It's possible this is just a form that your phenomena are taking. OTOH it's possible that this is a sign of error. - It's hard to tell from the far outside.
"In other words, instead of feeling like I am becoming more like the 'Bornless One', the opposite seems to be happening. When I do the Bornless Ritual, I become what feels like a distinct being with a different sense of self and the world then I normally have."
If all you're really saying is that your perceptions are dramatically changing, then, duh, that's the whole idea
But that may not be what you're saying."Should I try to ignore or brush away this sense of distinction? It bothers me because it starts to feel as if the 'Bornless One' is a different person that I am creating within my microcosm that has it's own microcosm...."
The Bornless One IS a different person than you are. It cannot, in any sense, fit into your universe. There just isn't room.
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@Jim Eshelman said
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The Bornless One IS a different person than you are. It cannot, in any sense, fit into your universe. There just isn't room."When I started using the Bornless Ritual on a daily basis, I expected a gradual union of my ego with the force of the Bornless One.
What I seem to be getting is an increasing distinction between my ego and the Bornless One. It is not becoming more like me nor I more like it. It is simply becoming it's own person...it's own self.
So I feel like I'm nurturing another person.. it's that strong. It has it's own will and it's own perspective on everything. It's like I'm creating a golem or something.
So instead of union, the gulf between my ego and the Bornless One increases as the Bornless One feels like it is 'its own man."If the Bornless One can't fit into our universe because there isn't room, then what we are doing is creating another person with it's own will?
So the Bornless Ritual is really a work of creating another being or person, some magickal child or homolucous?I continue the rituals, I hope that after some period of differentiation there is some integration.
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@Mahanta70 said
"When I started using the Bornless Ritual on a daily basis, I expected a gradual union of my ego with the force of the Bornless One."
The more likely effect is a reception of the essence of the Angel at the level of subconsciousness.
"What I seem to be getting is an increasing distinction between my ego and the Bornless One. It is not becoming more like me nor I more like it. It is simply becoming it's own person...it's own self."
I've written over and over again: The nature of the K&C of the HGA is a wedding - it's coitus, not masturbation. If there isn't the sense of a distinctive OTHER with whom to copulate, then something is likely off.
You may also be seeing the dramatization of just how far the current constitution of your personality pattern is from your authentic (or ideal) nature.
"So I feel like I'm nurturing another person.. it's that strong. It has it's own will and it's own perspective on everything. It's like I'm creating a golem or something."
Of course, it's also possible you aren't connecting with the Bornless One, but with one that you are conceiving and birthing - an artificial creation of your own.
"If the Bornless One can't fit into our universe because there isn't room, then what we are doing is creating another person with it's own will?"
Ah, see, that's what I was wondering. You see this as creating someone or something. That goes a long way to explain what you're reportiong.
The Holy Guardian Angel is infinite in nature. There isn't room for all of that in the framework of our normal experience of ourself.
"So the Bornless Ritual is really a work of creating another being or person, some magical child or homolucous?"
No, no, and no. Absolutely not.
I continue the rituals, I hope that after some period of differentiation there is some integration."
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@Jim Eshelman said
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@Mahanta70 said
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"So I feel like I'm nurturing another person.. it's that strong. It has it's own will and it's own perspective on everything. It's like I'm creating a golem or something."Of course, it's also possible you aren't connecting with the Bornless One, but with one that you are conceiving and birthing - an artificial creation of your own.
"If the Bornless One can't fit into our universe because there isn't room, then what we are doing is creating another person with it's own will?"
Ah, see, that's what I was wondering. You see this as creating someone or something. That goes a long way to explain what you're reportiong.
The Holy Guardian Angel is infinite in nature. There isn't room for all of that in the framework of our normal experience of ourself."
"Thanks for your response Jim.
So since I conceive of this as a possible creative act(I have not approached it that way in ritual) does that mean I likely am not connecting with the Bornless One and am instead messing around with an artificial creation?
How can exactly can a magician make this determination?
How does the magician know the Bornless One he invoked using the Bornless Ritual is in fact the real Bornless One and not some mocked up copy or artificial creation?
I will continue the invocations with caution... I don't want to engage in self deception.
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@Mahanta70 said
"So since I conceive of this as a possible creative act(I have not approached it that way in ritual) does that mean I likely am not connecting with the Bornless One and am instead messing around with an artificial creation?"
I don't know. It's hard to tell this from "the outside." But even in the best of conditions there is a certain measure of one's projections getting in the way for a time. Although there seems to be always something worthwhile to gain from this practice, it would be unusual for someone to have significand success without having first travelled well down the path of initiation. (Remember, you are striving for an effect that is the specific task of the seventh grade in the A.'.A.'. system.)
"How does the magician know the Bornless One he invoked using the Bornless Ritual is in fact the real Bornless One and not some mocked up copy or artificial creation?"
That's one of the things gained from having walked through the grades in order, step-by-step. One's truth-sense becomes stronger and keenly honed, and one's relationship with the Angel establishes itself at earlier levels that progressively lead one closer and closer to the center.