First Ritual in Years

Avshalom Binyamin

It has been a while since I have done anything other than an LBRP. The last time I was doing ritual frequently, I felt like I had become unbalanced and decided I needed to take a break from magick and work on refining my personality. Obviously I'm not done with that (they call it the Great Work, not the Pretty Good Work), but I recently realized that I had been putting magick off because I was afraid of making a mistake.

But that's letting the perfect be the enemy of the good. We learn by doing. And mistakes are part of that. You have to go through the awkward phase when you acquire a new skill.

So here, for general edification, is my record of my first ritual since my break.

Situation: A well-respected, week-long tango workshop for musicians happens once a year at a local University. Last year I made a wish to attend this year. April 30 is the early-bird registration deadline, at a rate several hundred dollars less than the normal rate. But I moved in April, and barely had enough to pay this month's bills, let alone afford the tuition.

Having exhausted all the mundane avenues I could think of, I decided that this would be a good first ritual. April 30 was looming, so there would be barely enough time to get everything together. And barely enough time is ideal for creating art. I re-read the relevant chapters of Magick in Theory in Practice and did all the preliminary meditations and visualizations, and then decided to use Sample Ritual 4: Ease of Circumstances, from Jim's excellent 776 1/2.

On Tuesday afternoon, I went out in search of supplies. I had to go to two different magick stores to find suitable candles and incense. I tracked down uncirculated quarters at a coin collector's store. The moon was in 4th quarter, waxing gibbous. It would be fuller over the next few days, but then that would be cutting time awfully close for the 30th. I chose 9:30 pm. Jupiter would be on the ascendant, sextile to Pluto and Mars. The moon would also be angular (on the MC), trining the sun.

I set up the temple and prepared myself.

Ritual:

Outline:
LBRP
LHRP
Statement of Intent
Middle Pillar
Lighting of the Tapers
Visualization
LHRP
LBRP

Notes:
LBRP: Good
LHRP: Good
Statement of Intent: Good
Middle Pillar: Good
Lighting of the Tapers: Good
Visualization: Good. In the moment, I decided to sing a tango to the candles. On a whim, I chose "Bajo Un Cielo De Estrellas" (Under a starry sky--the title seems apropos in retrospect). The candles' flames were perfectly motionless the entire song, and I felt like the candles were conscious and watching me. It was very strange. When I tried to add more incense I singed my fingers on the brazier (note to get a larger brazier for next time). It felt like a small "sacrifice". I succeeded at inflaming myself, while also praying to have my wish rejected if it was not for me.
LHRP: Good
LBRP: Good

Result:
Over the next few days, no money came my way. I learned several things. One: that I may not get what I wanted, and that was ok. This would teach me to prepare more for the future and take better care of my finances. Two: since magick is about making the mundane space of my body and temple match the magical forces I aspired to invoke, doing magick well is the same learning and character-refining process as becoming the sort of person that would achieve my mundane aspirations. Ritual teaches attention to deal, preparation, deliberateness. And it reveals what is important to us.

This morning, I saw a quote on Facebook, from the Temple of Thelema's page: “We perform rituals for the purpose of knowing and controlling unseen forces of Nature which reside within ourselves.” – Phyllis Seckler

I committed myself to continue with my ritual work. I felt very motivated.

Then, this afternoon, I received a large check in the mail--a refund for my deposit from my last place. It was almost two weeks early, and for the full amount--more than enough to pay for tuition. The landlord had a history of illegal charges, delaying tactics, and general difficulty. So this was no small miracle.

The letter was postmarked April 25, the day after my ritual.

I'm feeling a lot of gratitude. To Nuit, to my angel, to the Temple of Thelema, and to Jim.

oldfriend56

beautiful.

Ankh

93,

"Quote: Avshalom Binyamin I needed to take a break from magick and work on refining my personality."

Thanks for sharing Av, I have had similar dry spells as well.
What I do is this, I incorporate Tarot Meditations from Liber-T, into my daily Magick routine along with the LBRP & MP Ritual. I also, take the time to meditate on the one of the 32 paths of wisdom using the Tarot. That way, I am constantly doing something. It makes me feel like, I am on track spiritually.

Thanks again for sharing your experience you are not alone.

Danica

Hermitas

Av,

What size candles did you use? The instruction seem to indicate letting them burn til they go out (am I wrong?), so how long are we talking?

Avshalom Binyamin

Small tapers (about 5 inches). They were still burning when I finished the ritual and banished, and I let them burn all the way. I'm guessing it was about an hour after the ritual?

Hermitas

Ahh... I just found the mini-tapers ("spell candles") on the internet. That's makes WAY more sense. lol