College of Thelema: Thelemic Education

I'm very grateful to you both Jim and Gnosomai, for both your very thoughtful and kind help in previous posts. I find the pursuit of such knowledge so very enjoyable. Honestly I could live for a thousand years and there would still be books on magick that I would still want to have read, or reread and again reflect upon. Such a lovely task.

93,

"Hi Greg, I am heading along the same lines but I'm full of doubt about it."

Good, I am doubtful my name is Greg 😆 . I am still doubtful about it, until I am given a better explanation or have a more lucid experience, I will stick to my best interpretation.

Doubt is not a terrible thing! I am not going to quote the book of Lies, I am sure everyone is familiar with the chapter around here.

"Discussing this, it seems to clarify for me at least, that there really is another being concerning tarot. It doesn't seem to me to simply be a case of seeking the answers within. I don't feel that I have the answers. I don't feel that my power extends to see the true face of things past, present and future."

You talk very down about yourself sometimes. "Every man and every woman is a star", "I am the flame that burns in the heart of every man." You are a part of the body of Nuit, within you is the flame of Hadit. You are divine, why would the answers not be contained within yourself?

"It doesn't feel like the Kingdom of heaven is within at all so to speak."

I would say that Liber Legis politely disagrees, or at least, it does the way I read it!

"Not sure why you think Water on left, Fire on right is wrong - it's exactly right! That suggest that this is not an emblem to be worn, but rather a picture to be looked at. "

I agree but because of the lunar and solar pentacles it means that cups are solar and wands are lunar.

Personally, I've learnt a great deal from my frustration. I could have just assumed that I was in fact a great and powerful mage that could do whatever the hell I wanted, but in actual fact I've been humbled by the experience and seen that I was quite arrogant to assume that I could invoke these forces without first tipping my hat to them. I think my arrogance could have been my undoing in this.

In the unlikely event that anyone is wondering about the origin of the Celtic Cross spread, I found a passage in "Self-Initiation into the Golden Dawn Tradition" by the Ciceros that says in section 10 of the Philosophus grade section that this layout was "recommended to Outer Order initiates in Mather's day, because it was simple and direct."