Finding my True Will
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@Jim Eshelman said
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@Archaeus said
"I can see though how a person might mistake emergence into Yetzirah for K&C, because for me it's been something of an epochal change of perspective and something that I didn't expect to happen in quite such a marked and literal way."And remember, this is the level comparable to the old GD 5=6: The A.'.A.'. 2=9 initiation is adapted from the GD 5=6 ritual formula; and the functional difference between First and Second Order G.D. was the Assiah vs. Yetzirah distinction. (The same is true in A.'.A.'., actually, since the Second Order formally begins with 2=9.)
My reason for mentioning this is that a lot of the better stuff in print from the old G.D. paradigm will describe 5=6 (including K&C) in terms that are highly characteristic of A.'.A.'. 2=9. These writings can be misleading, especially because the phenomena sound so on-target for what one might expect from the images and words of K&C of HGA."
That's pretty much the kind of material I've been reading, it's quite plain how the old GD ZAM grade etc correspond to what we now call 2=9 and so on. During my own 1=10 (which I'm still in, but only by a matter of weeks) I went through the old Golden Dawn material as part of a general exploration of the lower part of the Tree of Life, doing everything in Assiah/Malkuth as it were and pathworking my way up to Tiphareth. The whole period was pretty full on, especially as I'm doing a degree at the same time.
I understand that ritual CXX is analogous to the old GD 5=6 (The numbering is a give away) although I've refrained from reading any of the online versions because I don't want to spoil it for myself.
Getting back to the original poster though: If there's one thing I've learned and thus advise I would give is that the best results don't so much come when you are looking for them, but come along almost despite your efforts, in ways that can be very suprising and as a result of simply planing a regime of study and practice and sticking to it. Quite simply, follow out the tasks of each grade faithfully and sure as 1+1=2 the results will follow.
But yes, aspiration to the HGA helps; which is why a 0=0 wears the robe of a 5=6 (more or less)
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@Katanoese said
"After a bit of research, I came upon "Sample Ritual #9" in 776 1/2, which resonated strongly with me, and seems to describe a procedure I can benefit greatly from in my situation .. That is - purifying the personality and perceptions, prompting the Khabs to flow out and purify the Khu / aura, and thus hopefully the True Will can not only shine forth and become perceptible to the consciousness, but also become more effective in my life through the more effective and attuned Khu .."
Don't take this the wrong way, but what exactly makes you think that performing a ritual is going to enable you to gain insight into yourself, let alone enable you to discover your True Will?
Yes, I understand that you say the goal of the ritual is to "purify the personality and perceptions, prompting the Khabs to flow out" and yada yada yada, but what makes you think that performing a ritual will do this? The fact is that no amount of "ritual work" is going to get an individual even a jot closer to discovering his true will.
I've said elsewhere in many places that one needs a crystal clear understanding of the goals and what one is trying to do and how the practices are supposed to achieve those goals, and here's a practical example of why it's important.
As I explained earlier in the thread, the work of discovering the True Will is a process of observing your Self and adjusting behavior in real time. The vital part is doing it in real-life, day-to-day situations. That's how you "purify the personality," although that's not the most precise phrase to use, since you're not really "purifying" anything but rather learning to see past certain illusions. You don't "purify the personality" by sitting around and playing imagination games. That's just going to generate more illusions.
Now, if you were to say that you think performing this ritual might impress certain ideas upon your mind, which you would carry with you into your daily life and thus find assists you with the real work of observing your self in day-to-day life, then at least that would make a little bit of sense. I still would dispute that the ritual work adds anything substantial to the process, but at least you'd have a clearer idea of what's actually going on, and you'd be in a position to investigate yourself and see if, in your case, the ritual really does add anything substantial to the process.
For the most part, I consider all of this ritual stuff a complete and total distraction, more likely to mislead than help, and I think engaging in it should be primarily because you enjoy performing the rituals and enjoy the feelings they create in you, not because you think they're going to do anything in regards to giving you insight into yourself.
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@Los said
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For the most part, I consider all of this ritual stuff a complete and total distraction, more likely to mislead than help, and I think engaging in it should be primarily because you enjoy performing the rituals and enjoy the feelings they create in you, not because you think they're going to do anything in regards to giving you insight into yourself.""Thou hast no right but to do thy will."
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@Los said
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For the most part, I consider all of this ritual stuff a complete and total distraction, more likely to mislead than help, and I think engaging in it should be primarily because you enjoy performing the rituals and enjoy the feelings they create in you, not because you think they're going to do anything in regards to giving you insight into yourself.""The word of Sin is Restriction."
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I appreciate the extremely selective quotation, guys, but being able to rattle off phrases that you think are relevant isn’t a substitute for understanding those verses in the first place.
For starters, "Restriction" has a specific meaning in Thelema -- restricting the manifestation of one's True Will by following mental illusions instead of attending to reality (Crowley puts it: "This is sin: / To hold thy holy self in"). As part of manifesting the True Will, one needs to have a clear understanding of the terrain through which one is navigating.
It's not "Restriction," then, to recommend that someone have a clear understanding of reality and what's going on. For example, a math teacher isn't "restricting" you by telling you when you've made an incorrect answer, a history teacher isn't "restricting" you by telling you what actually happened in history, and I'm not "restricting" you by telling you that you need to have a clear understanding of what you're doing if you want any of this stuff to work.
Ironically, it would be "Restriction" to insist on trusting one's own precious feelings and "intuitions" instead of bothering to figure out what's really going on.
As far as "thou hast no right but to do thy will" goes, one cannot follow that verse without understanding what True Will actually is, and properly understanding how that term is defined in Thelema isn't "restriction": it's foundational to doing any work at all toward discovering it.
As I was pointing out, if we define True Will as Crowley did, which involves gaining insight into one's Self, then one needs to be asking questions such as "How could doing some ritual or sitting around imagining something possibly give me insight into myself?" Coming up with a critical and serious answer to such a question isn't "Restriction": it's the one possible way to avoid Restriction.
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@Los said
"I appreciate the extremely selective quotation, guys, but being able to rattle off phrases that you think are relevant isn’t a substitute for understanding those verses in the first place.
For starters, "Restriction" has a specific meaning in Thelema -- restricting the manifestation of one's True Will by following mental illusions instead of attending to reality (Crowley puts it: "This is sin: / To hold thy holy self in"). As part of manifesting the True Will, one needs to have a clear understanding of the terrain through which one is navigating.
It's not "Restriction," then, to recommend that someone have a clear understanding of reality and what's going on. For example, a math teacher isn't "restricting" you by telling you when you've made an incorrect answer, a history teacher isn't "restricting" you by telling you what actually happened in history, and I'm not "restricting" you by telling you that you need to have a clear understanding of what you're doing if you want any of this stuff to work.
Ironically, it would be "Restriction" to insist on trusting one's own precious feelings and "intuitions" instead of bothering to figure out what's really going on.
As far as "thou hast no right but to do thy will" goes, one cannot follow that verse without understanding what True Will actually is, and properly understanding how that term is defined in Thelema isn't "restriction": it's foundational to doing any work at all toward discovering it.
As I was pointing out, if we define True Will as Crowley did, which involves gaining insight into one's Self, then one needs to be asking questions such as "How could doing some ritual or sitting around imagining something possibly give me insight into myself?" Coming up with a critical and serious answer to such a question isn't "Restriction": it's the one possible way to avoid Restriction."
If you can answer the question "Why am I doing this" with anything other than "it is my Will," then you aren't doing your Will, you are doing the "why." Why am I doing this? To gain something other than this? That is not "pure will."
[Edit: I'm not responsible for Bereshith's interpretations of what I write]
[Edit: PS. Nowhere in the Book of the Law does it mention "True Will."]
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@Takamba said
"If you can answer the question "Why am I doing this" with anything other than "it is my Will," then you aren't doing your Will, you are doing the "why." Why am I doing this? To gain something other than this? That is not "pure will.""
But this thread is in the context of someone trying to figure out how to discover his True Will. An aspirant cannot sensibly answer the question "How do I discover my True Will?" with "It's my True Will!" That's a bunch of nonsense.
In order to answer the question "How do I discover my True Will?" a person needs to know at least:
--What the concept "True Will" means
--The steps a person should use to discover True Will
--Why he should think the particular steps in question actually do lead to the discovery of the True Will
--The specific criteria by which he can judge that the steps have actually worked to allow him to discover the True Will.Crystal clear understanding of these things is vital for success: a person can't shrug this off or just declare, as policy, that whatever they do is already their True Will. It makes nonsense out of the whole idea of working to discover the will, and it makes Thelema meaningless.
Discovering the True Will is a task, and there's no reason to suppose that it doesn't require a crystal clear understanding of the subject, like any other task.
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@Takamba said
"[Edit: PS. Nowhere in the Book of the Law does it mention "True Will."]"
Yeah, but the guy who invented Thelema -- Aleister Crowley -- created and defined that term in a very specific way. If one is interested in practicing Thelema, and doing it intelligently, one needs to know what it requires and how to do it. Merely guessing or merely trusting what someone else says isn't going to cut it, unless one is looking for some kind of religion.
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@Los said
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But this thread is in the context of someone trying to figure out how to discover his True Will.""How?" is a great question. I was demonstrating that when one stops and asks, "why?" one has stopped "doing." If one has an answer for "why" other than "it is my nature, it is my self, it is my will," then the "will" is naught. It is certainly not "True."
The belief in a "True Will" has a lot of danger to it. Some seem to view it as some sort of ordained destiny, from on high, previously determined. Instead, I recommend we think in nautical terms, true north, true east. Direct (True) Will. You do not "discover" this, you adhere to it.
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@Takamba said
""How?" is a great question. I was demonstrating that when one stops and asks, "why?" one has stopped "doing." If one has an answer for "why" other than "it is my nature, it is my self, it is my will," then the "will" is naught. It is certainly not "True.""
Well, yeah. A person's will is a person's will. There's no "why" to it. But if someone wants to do something toward a certain end -- such as, for example, discover the True Will in the first place -- then we would expect that the person (if he wants to practice intelligently) would ask critical questions of practices: what they supposedly accomplish, why he would think they actually do accomplish these things, and how he tells.
"The belief in a "True Will" has a lot of danger to it. Some seem to view it as some sort of ordained destiny, from on high, previously determined. Instead, I recommend we think in nautical terms, true north, true east. Direct (True) Will. You do not "discover" this, you adhere to it."
True Will is most definitely not some preordained path. It is -- to oversimplify a bit -- what a person would naturally do if his mind would stop telling him that he "should" be doing something else "because" of some silly reason (such as "because it's the right thing to do" or "because it's for the good of humanity!" or "because you're such-and-such kind of person").
I do think that True Will has to be discovered because our thoughts, emotions, feelings, intuitions, etc. "veil" the True Will from us. We discover (literally dis-cover, remove the covering from) our True Wills by increasing our powers of observation and learning to see "through" the illusions of our minds, exactly as I explained earlier in the thread.
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@Los said
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"The belief in a "True Will" has a lot of danger to it. Some seem to view it as some sort of ordained destiny, from on high, previously determined. Instead, I recommend we think in nautical terms, true north, true east. Direct (True) Will. You do not "discover" this, you adhere to it."
"Exactly. Why ask why? Just a swift "How" on the butt and a stern "Do" on the back. Ask after, when the data is collected, "Did or did not?" and learn from that.
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@Takamba said
"Exactly. Why ask why? Just a swift "How" on the butt and a stern "Do" on the back. Ask after, when the data is collected, "Did or did not?" and learn from that."
Because before a person can "adhere" to the True Will, "discover" it, or do anything with it, that person has to know what it is and how to go about working with it. And the person needs to have specific, intelligent, coherent, and demonstrable answers to those questions if he wants to do an intelligent job of attaining.
That's why you ask why. Just telling an aspirant "Go out and do it" tells them absolutely nothing and is incredibly unhelpful.
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@ Los
I find my quotation of "The word of Sin is Restriction" entirely relevant to your motivations in attempting to dissuade others from using ritual to discover their True Will.
To me, you seem to weave your words together in such a way that basically attempts to restrict others from participating in, or even experimenting with, ritual's power to help them discover their True Will unless they *a priori *agree with you that it's all just bullshit anyway.
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@Aleister Crowley in The Book of Lies said
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PILGRIM-TALKO thou that settest out upon The Path, false is the Phantom that thou seekest. When thou hast it thou shalt know all bitterness, thy teeth fixed in the Sodom-Apple. Thus hast thou been lured along That Path, whose terror else had driven thee far away. O thou that stridest upon the middle of The Path, no phantoms mock thee. For the stride's sake thou stridest. Thus art thou lured along That Path, whose fascina- tion else had driven thee far away. O thou that drawest toward the End of The Path, effort is no more. Faster and faster dos thou fall; thy weariness is changed into Ineffable Rest. For there is not Thou upon That Path: thou hast become The Way."
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@Bereshith said
"To me, you seem to weave your words together in such a way that basically attempts to restrict others from participating in, or even experimenting with, ritual's power to help them discover their True Will unless they *a priori *agree with you that it's all just bullshit anyway."
As I just explained, it's not "restriction" to encourage people to ask themselves critical questions about their practice.
For example, I suppose that you think ritual has "power" to "help [people] discover their True Will." So -- since this thread is about discovering the True Will -- how about you tell us exactly why you think that ritual actually does do this?
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@Los said
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@Bereshith said
"To me, you seem to weave your words together in such a way that basically attempts to restrict others from participating in, or even experimenting with, ritual's power to help them discover their True Will unless they *a priori *agree with you that it's all just bullshit anyway."As I just explained, it's not "restriction" to encourage people to ask themselves critical questions about their practice.
For example, I suppose that you think ritual has "power" to "help [people] discover their True Will." So -- since this thread is about discovering the True Will -- how about you tell us exactly why you think that ritual actually does do this?"
In my experience, such intentional symbolic actions consciously stimulate and precisely focus an internal dialogue that carries on beyond the act of the ritual itself.
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@Bereshith said
"In my experience, such intentional symbolic actions consciously stimulate and precisely focus an internal dialogue that carries on beyond the act of the ritual itself."
Ok, and they may well do this, depending on what you mean. If you mean that the ritual summons up certain kinds of thoughts that stay with you during the day and encourage you to think about them, I'd agree that rituals do that. Of course, lots of activities have that result. For example, watching an episode of Breaking Bad also "stimulates" and "focus[es]" an inner dialogue, and it usually stays with the viewer long after the episode is over.
And that brings me to my point: just because something "stimulates" an "inner dialogue" doesn't mean that it has anything to do with the True Will or brings a person any closer to discovering the True Will. So what, precisely, do you think this "inner dialogue" has to do with the True Will and how does it enable you to uncover that Will?
The more specific your answer, the better (especially for you, since answering these questions is primarily going to help you do the work).
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@Los said
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The more specific your answer, the better (especially for you, since answering these questions is primarily going to help you do the work)."
actually, the more you go about searching for this answers intellectually, the more you are mentally masturbating, and it will not help you to DO the work. the thing that does help to do the work is - doing the work, not thinking incessantly about doing it 
