College of Thelema: Thelemic Education

93

More often than not- the truth and accuracy are harsh as the Tao says- so I thiank you for youe input and saving me valuble time and especially money.

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93

Been looking at the E.A. Koetting "Become a Living God" info- even though I realize I and everyone else on this planet are Living Gods, Being able to activate the Powers and Forces has been difficult; mostly due to stressful external confinments. Is anyone familiar with this course?

Going to spend a lot of meditational time trying to see how I can lessen the daily mundane attacks of life in order to be able to engage in Practice with more focus.

Thanks for the replies. I will read the other works mentioned and am sure I will be richly fed beyond what the Jason miller book offered. Thanks Much

Thanks Excellant! For some reason I am very- 'insultingly opposed' to systems which make 'impressive Higher Way' claims, then after one travels down the path abit find some of the same old--boys on top girlswhere you belong on bottom, walk behind me understand you are not meant to be the top of the pyramid. I kinda have always has abit of discomfort with the "phallic Sun" thelema lamen, not to sure why other than somehow I became a female worshipper, and actually sex has never been at the top of the power pyramid (which I admit is more than likely some form of imbalance).
That you are strengthened and empowered as a Human Being- and you gender is not enforced upon you as some sort of predetermined pigeonholing by the system is really appreciated.
Alot of this may simply be my witnessing my mother being beaten to death by my stepdad and how at the time society- including my family and religion simply took it as a metter of course- thats is just how that family operates, marriage puts the female under the dominion of the male, so o well. Somehow during those years my "Holy Guardian Angel" which I called my "Spirit Guide" assisted me in "building a 'Temple in my Heart' and keeping some of the deatails to myself for the time being, within "The Holy of Holies" is a Lady Goddess upon the Alter I kneel to. This happened to me during my 9-10 years of age.
Thanks alot, sorry for the weird way I write or pose questions; just about ready to give up on being able to write in ways that are not annoying, offputting or incomprehensible. 93's

yeah, that was me in the Ipsissmus thread.

As for my daughter. I in no way and telling to enter the threlemic Path, just making sure she can see clearly the Banquet Table the Universe Presents. A:.A:. is just another food being offered, She (I think) is kinda being pulled this way and that, She really like theh Hecate realm, Wicca seems to be inundating alot- but she is not getting any one on one attention; I think an A:.A:. Path will give her the one on on, as well as help her to work whichever of the other paths she should choose. It likely will be along time until she can settle down into something, as a new single mother, with some "High Demand" special needs children, the most she can do is read abit, and hope. Ii am the last person she needs tugging her in any direction.

I s there any 'degree' pendants representing A:.A:. degrees? is there an Ipsissmus pendant? and discussing my 'siver chain' I am supposed to create, I am kinda blank- can anyone tell me what they have and what moved them for that? I would really appreciate.

Thanks for all these awesome words of counsel. I have a daughter, (actually 3) but who is particularly wrenched her way free of the slavegods and the man who was his prison warden over her. {I accept most of the responsibility for the event of her 'union' with this evil septic sludge of a being} but she is very stronly drawn to magical worlds and anything pagan and witchcraft. There are alot of Stars in the 'sky of the internet' all offering wonderful environments for the worlds which circle them. i do what I can to help her make some progress, but wonder if she can work to grow in her witchcraft as well as work and study in Thelema/A:.A:.. As it is I really want her under the protective guidence of a mentor.
She has been through 10 years of a very unique hell, and has 5 children who really batter her at times. She escaped as a plural wife in a mormon polygamist cult, she is so alone, and so distrustful but wants so badly to begin and build her spiritual life, I can't help but feel the Path to Ipsissmus would really do her well.
I can talk to her freely about it well enough, but as I am just begining- I wonder what better I can introduce her to to liven her spark.
LVX

Well, being a pretty well not well versed student of this Path, through all of the readings of this post I still come with only one answer which to me seems efficacious. The only worthy words in the bible- and I admit to paraphrasing to the point of inserting my own word; ..."Behold- Humanity has become As One Of Us..." from this I would move on to a quote by AC, of which I do not have it exactly or a referance, but I read it a couple days ago, it goes something like this ..."After one has examined all of the gods and systems one realises they they have only found theirself..." So I find that rather than fretting over addressing a particular deity, I focus on the fact that at some point, I may see only faintlythe aspects of the diety which I wish to see. And ultimately in focusing in these beings- their fullness only represents my ultimate goal of Ipsissmus. praying and devotional service to myself? Blasphemy? Heresy? Maybe- but it appears to me that if these beings have achieved the status we seek in them- they would far and away rather Associate with Fellows and Co-Equals; than groveling serfs who cannot see themselves free from the SlaveGods. Therefore "Do what thou wilt" becomes something far differant from the Libertine foolishness which hints that any foolish action is in the future unaccountable- but that our actions should mimic the highest valors in purpose of those dieties whose alliance we seek. Jesus, for what it is worth stated"...Ye are Gods..." which clearly insinuates, we already have the innate powers within us as Co_Creators, therefore Act like it. (please don't hurt me)

Greetings:

Ladies, I have a question. In this world where in my opinion there most surely is a concerted effort to depower, squelch, minimise and render demeaned the Female of our species. How well do you feel Thelema, OTO A:.A:. as a culture and practice has Strengthened you, Empowered you, been workable and even handed with you ? Have you felt it is geared to keeping you equal to males? If you think it is ok, elivated you above your male peers,(and frankly as a "Female Adoree" that is quite ok in my world so don't be shy). If you feel as a female our american culture limits the role of women- do you feel the thelemic way has empowered you? Please I really want your opinion.

To all who put in thier 2 cents- and even a couple dollars, I say thanks, I have been trying to work out what to say, so the best I can do is thank the following and throw a couple words to them on some details. Chioa Khan, I do thank you, but I gotta handle you alone. As usual, just try to get the point and ignore bad grammer, punctuation, and anything else which may leave the Council of Oxford squirm and english teachers heading for the rope in the closet.

Takamba- thanks, I will take up your advice, and ai also found a smaller banishing ritual which actually leaves some room for personalisation making it fit her situation perfectly.

Uni_verse, Thanks, I totally agree and will do.

Los - Thanks so much. I really appreciate your words, she will be in good hands. We homeschooled all 5 of my children, unfortuantely got swindled by Stratford, their info makes a good pitch that they are accredited- did not find out till too late that they were not and so wasted a shitload of money, time, and now 2 of my daughters had to do their High School all over, one GED'd and was ok, the other is in another program- sadly 10 years after she should have graduated.
Sadly most states are pretty hands off homschooler; some will have help for the parents to do all they can, california is pretty good about it, we went to missouri which could care less if your kid is even alive. Long story short, my other remaining 3 children have all accomplished the Accredited Penn Foster HS, in fact my youngest son who is currently preparing for his 4th combat tour of afghanistan, began and finished his HS in 9 months at 15 (he thought he could enlist early and get into combat faster--he was very disappointed and pent up by the time his 1ts tour began at 19., I think with a 3.5 or higher, while working full time as well. My youngest childer- a daughter also began and finished hers in 9 months- also at 15, and was Asst. Manager of a pizza joint as well as doing a year of pheonix Online- but then she got a boyfirend and- i still think boyfriends are bad ideas. but hey, not bad for 15 y/o's.

Horus Amin- I wish so badly I lived close enough to go to a Gnostic Mass, but 100+ miles is the closest, and we have some extreme medical needs for my wife which keeps me locked down as far as travel goes. She has no kidneys and is on Home Hemo Dialysis, 5x per week 6-8 hours per session. She was actually working full time for 7 years also, but her body had been ravaged by complications and staying home is the best we can do. but Home ritual is something the whole family (living in the house) is wanting to do; and as a 30+ Priest/ High priest, I feel quite comfortable making sure things are taken care of if needed. but many thanks

I think that is all of the ones I felt I could do well, If I forgot any, sorry and thanks and feel free to hit me up and discuss.

Chioa- I will work on yours tomarrow, it is after midnight and I am abiit brainfried. Which I think you suspect anyway.

Thanks again all.

WOW !!!! Glad I asked, kinda trippin. Alot of validity in all points; alot of sorrow for some in a way. Going to take some time to chew.
wow

Thanks for the reply; I think the one thing we are safe on is me "talking down" to aly of the kids. I am always taken to task for talking to them as if they were an understanding adult. But thanks for the data and I will review it and implement all that I can.
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Please- do not refrain, yes. my grammer sucks, spelling etc. nut did you get the point and do you have directions or answers. i may like them I may not, I may use them they may not be useable. Point is- i am an empty vessel, start pouring and lets see if it can edify, and even if it don't feed me, some other poor soul may just get the perfect word they have needed. its not all about me- so speaketh; please

Greetings,

Quite by accident I was given Jason Millers The Sorceror Secret for christmas. At first I was quite hesitanjt about it; but then I have this habit of reading a book which I amj quite sure I would not like for the simply, "mental excersize of the grey matter. I soon found it quite enjoyable and actually felt I had been prepared through 51 years of really wierd and uncommon life experiance (maybe even some from my previous life) to begin this work. Still, millions of questions- most of which looking like I won't get much of an answer. luckily, of all my time preparing, I always kept some effort going on what I called The Crowley Speedbump. On the superficialist of levels all signs said chuck this luny and his work, luckily- him being a luny and full of antics is just what I need to look deeper before I cast any final decision. now I have a new "Dead Friend" who is a valueble genius in my world.
As for Mr Miller, his book is pretty good, but I keep thinking i am only getting tiny bits of much bigger fish; ansd I also feel I have to get a better grip on the 'wierd lingo" in order to smooth out and put more decicivness in my ritual work.
Can someone tell me just what language he is using -is it just greek? if so I would like find a course to load onto my mp3 player for study, as well as latin.

I have said alot- not sure if I have asked much. But maybe someone out there can just kinda purge back what goes on in their head and we can meet in the Middle Ether.

Thanks

Frater Dark Matter

Greetings,

I have a grandhild- actually 9, but one in particular, who her mother and I (and she) feels she wants to begin building herslef using rituals and craftwork. Her mom is so totally bran new to things she is still just making things up as she goes along untill things settle down to where she can study a path and be abit more directed.

The child is absolutely sweet pure tender and tender hearted, easily takne by nievite, but wants to help her mom (and I) do rituals whenever she can. She also is one who is afraid of 'bumps in the night' - i have told you about our house spirits, she woke up one night with her bed shaking- and she has been abit spooked ever since.

I thought I could surf the net and get a good idea of how to help her begin using banishing rituals and Bornless rituals kinda on her level. Wow, real disappointment- I can't find anything. But thenm I may be asking the wrong things.
I could work up something- but I would like to know if there is anything already done for children to work- (I was a great sunday school and Priesthood Instructor- but for adults; children are a whole new universe and must be handled with care.) Her mom and I are actually going to make up a robew of sorts which she could even wear to bed on those intenser than normal scarey nights. But our goal is to get her to chuck fear, scarey and terror out the window asap. I am working on ndmaking her an wooden Athame and a
Wand. if anyone has any knowldge I would like recommendations on what would be the best wood to use, though I am thinking Rose wood for the wand.

If anyone has sources for children and occult ritual etc which they thinbk may help I would really appreciate it, so would mommy and Kathlene.

also, are there any books written for children along the lines of "my Mommy is a Witch", or "We live in a Magic family" I am sure she would love to read them, and we are huge library users- our library is pretty Christian Republican, but I can find books elsehwere or even on interlibrary loan.

We have also given her the "Guardian Goddess Name Inanna" hopefully imprinting on her that her and Inanna have a special working relationship.

Thanks

I have been trying to understand the Bornloess ritual,
OSORONNOPHRIS I am finding really difficult to understand;
I am thinking it is Greek, but when I look for a definition in greek
maybe I am not looking in the right place.
Can someone help me find the meaning of the word, ad well as
all of the other difficult to pronounce words, I am thinking that a knowldge of the meaning of the foriegn language would put abit more power into to effort used in the ritual.

Thanks

Master Eshelman;

I do thank you so much for your wine analogy. Sadly I am not the conoseur you are; but I do get the point. Sadly, I do not mean to describe my house spirits as good or bad necessarily- it appears I really screwed on that. As houseguests, yes, ajnd my hope is to get along with them all, hoping that at least with Reason we can learn to dwell together in some form of appreciable harmony. Even on the mortal plane I have a practice called, "Take the devil to lunch". There is little doubt I can be a certain and immediate thorn in the side of the most patient person when i fail in my mindfullness. Usually my "lunchguest' will show me this without me asking or his needing to verbalise it. Thankfully like I said the real troublemekers have left for the mostpart. With my wifes health being as delicate as it is, trying to keep things calm if not wholey supportive from the unseen realms is important IMO.
"The wind crosses over the water
and makes a wave;
Therefore we see the manifest
brought to pass by the unmanifest"
What I thank and do can create alot of wind on many levels.
I like the approach of padma Sambhava; he I am sure could have done some great exspellings exorcisms and what have you, but he Saw, they each and several of the spirits had value, and could be a added beauty to the tapestry which was Tibet.
So, they were allowed to stay, upon agreed principles, amd their nnate talents became blessings. So i wish it to be with my guests.

I wish to say more, but my sleep meds are kicking in, so I need to heed it.

Blessings and incredible Thanks for your time and wisdom and courtesy

#1- Thanks for all the replies, and the critiques. No real reasons for the grammer other than it was late at night, I was fatigued, and I was purging. That being said, I get alot of those complaints, especially from my wife. All I can say is when some would be speaking the same words- I notice they do not speak the punctuations. Muddled head- yeah, probably; got alot going on in there- BUT i WILL WORK ON IT.

2- I will continue to work on the head honcho in the house. Kinda hate rank in alot of ways- my basic buddhism; causes problems with labelling. I can assure you things were alot worse. Things are not being thrown at me or others the way they were.
Although last week a stack of dvd's narrowly missed me- I think it was mostly to get attention than hostility. We also have a very volitle nearly 11 boy who is potently stormy, Highly vicisouly angry at his mother for 'putting his dad in prison' even though he was kept at near starvation levels and tight social isolation.

3- I do not mind spirits in my realm, my entire life I have 'company' and several times have had my life saved; Like the time I was pulled over the top of a 300 ft. cliff while hanging onto a prickly pear cactus and foothold collapsed in the middle of the night during a survival trip. Always have live near cemetaries. I prefer to have them like the gang of mortal friends one hangs out with- we all have personalities- sometimes we bump or grind, but if we are not one for all and all for one; seems alittle zenoelitest to demand them be 'under me' in some derogatory way.

4- One thing which may be an issue, I just did not bring it up. I am a multiple "alien abductee", in fact, my now deceased sister stoicly claims it was because of "Them" that I was even concieved as my dad was vasectomied long before i came along- but I am more like him than anyone in the family in personality and likeness even though he died when I was 3.

5- As for abandoning the "Warlock" issue, not sure what one "Magic Form" superior or inferior to another. Should not a person magnify the Talents (as in Parable of the Talents) they are an inheritor of? I see witches, sorcerors, magicians- I assume each is working to magnify thier calling. Could someone explain?

6- I reall do appreciate all the counsel I recieved, though I am concerned over the need to pick out the punctuation and grammer at almost the cost of acknowledging the validity of what was said. Seems kinda like looking at a picture and being unhappy with the individual brushstrokes in an attempt to downgrade the entire canvas. True enough, my writing can reflect Dali struggling with Picaso over the same paintbrush while on LSD. So I will work on it- just try to focus on what is being said rahter than the mistrokes of how it is said if you can-(it is hard I know).

7- much humble thanks again. I am happy that with such a long way to go I have people farther down the road to Illuminate some of the rock and potholes I may grow lax and not pay attention to.

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Dark Matter

Greetings;

I am not sure if this is the correct place to put this or if there is a better one, but I will shoot here and hope for the best. This might be lengthy, but I kinda think the more data the better to have maximum output and insight.
To begin with, i come from a 30+ years background as a xtian High Priest Theologian/Theurgist (but I did not know about the latter it just happened without me 'working it to do so) Most of my years were spent in mostly finding most of my studies and experiances being shelved for later consideration, for they went as counter to the Ultra Orthodox I was pursuing as they possibly could. Also, I was not the most 'righteous of people " by the standards I was lined up to in my religious venue- and usually when I was at my lowest, I would have Spiritual Manifestations and phenominal Miracles in the most plentiful manner; leaving many even in my family to chaff more than a little. After a while "i went crazy- started taking things off the shelf (actually it caved in on my head) and I was forced to very carefully evaluate them. one item of note here, From the age of 15 I had very carefully read(actually studied) the bible KJV from cover to cover with pens pencils and highlighters 6 solid time and also did the same with a Catholic version with Apocrypha, a JW version (ouch!) the JST- as well as Hebrew and Greek Transliterations. but, "The Occult, mysticism, etc and "Dark Arts" which are anathema, were often the only places any of the insanity of the above reads made any sence. As well I almost memorised most of the Mormon Scriptures. However- it was by using them that I was finally hauled into a "Court of Love" and excomm'd" for Being an "Apostate and Severe Threat to the Church" aka, teaching what joseph smith and brigham young had taught ie, that the church would go into apostacy, loose its validity with thier god- and here are the very clealy enumerated reasons Why, and easy Signs to prove that it happened.
Took awhile, but now I am finally setteling into working as a Luciferian Warlock, who has no discomfort in the company of what I call "Spiritual Atheists" and "Hitchens type" outright atheists. All truth can be brought into one Great Whole- and mormonism can go into one great hole; for all the value it has now.
i am study working Goetia, Golden Dawn, Sorcery ala Jason Miller, and working as a probationner under a differing A:.A:. line. Not that it is mattering here, I am also working with a Soveriegn Sanctuary in Italy translating thier rites from Italian to English (not so easy even with google translator) in the effort to open a Lodge and system under their auspices not too long from now. I am also working on creating my own set of rituals for the inner circle around me, finishing that is looking into a volcanic ash cloud right now.
This I do at night when all are in bed, I am disabled by 3 failed back surguries, my wife is disabled with her kidneys removed and waiting for a transplant which will likely never happen due to high PRI. So I amk her Home HemoDialysis tech/nurse / do about everything else. 2 years ago we rescued my twin daughters from a mormon polygamist cult compound just out of Stockton missouri, with their total of 8 children under 10. one is still in hiding even though her so called husband has finally been convicted for at least 7 years of government housing with more to come we hope. and the other daughter and her 5 are living with us. She is currently working into witchcraft.
This brings me to the crux of the issue- hang on the house spirits are summoning me-ok, Im back. I am /renting to own a fairly good house of 100+ years old. And it has been the most spiritually active place I have ever been in... and i have been in afew. Things were so bad one week that I had to go upstairs which was where all the hassles were coming from and bein to cleanse the house, every room got a scrub, but I tried to be careful not to throw out 'good willed' spirits. But it was obvious any who lived here before us left some hideous fukheds behind. For instanse the guy who we are getting the house from is the king of evil assholes but in his mind Gods right hand man, sold one of his daughters to an 80 y/o polygamist guy who can't reproduce (she was 24 and was trained she would only breathe eat shit and think when 'her man' told her) for about 70k, we just found out about anouther daughter but details unclear. in a waY, HIS 'LEAVE BEHINDS' are as asshole as he is, and we have had some rank issues; right now I am gettiing the 'bad ones' to stand down, and the good ones we are on pretty good and getting better relations.
Last week, they decided to begin communicating with me. In a kinda wierd way. my youngest g-daughter has a little pink princess organpiano thing, with lights tones push a button and go have fun. long story short- i found out they wanted my attenion, and they finally got it. So now many nights when i am staying up doing my 'homework', they will begin 'making music' in order to call me over for a chat. Right now things are fairly ok we havesome basic commo going, but I would really like to make things easier for them and me. I really want us to work togetherto make both sides have a fulfilling an experiance as we can here. I even promised, (and I keep my promises) that when I win the lottery I will protect this house and turn it into a nice temple for them to party and live in in perpetuity. but still, we get some meanys and strays- and they tend to bug the kids, I am working on empowering them, but it can be hard for 3-5 y/o to catch on.
one of the things I am trying to work out with them is would they prefer me to Work Goetia, Golden Dawn, what? what would help them and us better. It appears they are not to well versed either. and oh BTW- my dogs and cats are always tripping on what going on, my lab Buster who though afraid of thunder would bite and take down a bolt of lightening if he could foor me, and he is almost daily jumping at someone and often chasing them up the stairs. Right now he is really on high alert as the piano keeps chiming here and there.
I also asked them if an oracle like a oijah board and or pendulum would be something they would appreciate (Q- I have a feeling homemade would be more efficacious- any opinions?) I would really like to hear what ya'll have to say. Sometimes they even use my laptop; one night they literally rewrote and antire 2 paragraphs when i was writing about this. Right now I have them trying to work out who is the leader spokesmen etc. sometimes they all begin hitting the piano and it is hard getting questions or statements answered.
Some of my g-kids, especially the wee ones are really uncomfortable with 'our other house guests/roomates' so I am trying to think of ways for them to feel empowered and able to comfortably "Preside over them" without causing a fight. Si I am wondering about pentagram banishing rituals etc, robes the whole bit. Anyone have any ideas?
Well, that is about all I can come up with now. Trying to do the best I can. i am much like Padme Sambhava; really thier is no need to battle for turf, and I am sure if I teach them the dhama even if they do not "convert" they will see the better communications and actions between us will meet our needs and theirs.

i very much look foreward to any wisdom from anyone who has some to share.

Namate'

James Staples VI
32 AASR
A:.A:. Probationer

Greetings to you all, last night, I registered and logged on, and wrote what I thought was one of my best intro's I have ever done. Then I previewed my work, looked good, and as it was 1;45 am, and i was soggy as hell from a long day I decided to shut down for the night. today, I logged on to see if I had eny replies saying Hi back. Look like hell and could not find what I wrote, then thanks Dear Dawn Bringer for alerting me to this- i did not hit Send- and off into the either and oblivion it goes.
Funny in a way.
So tonight I am just gonna say hi and ramble abit. I do have some concerns I am hoping someone here can help me with. I am a Probationer under a differant Line. Somehow- it just is not quite working; I am not 'feeling a connect'.
About a year ago I saw James Eshelmans book the mystical Magical system of A:.A:., seriously wanted to buy it, but being kinda broke and daily working in "Home Emergency Mgt." just ain't got it yet. Even tried to get it through interlibrary loan- no luck. I have been involved with with site only 48 hrs. I think I have gotten more answers than ever from my line( of which I also feel abit of disinterest from) and wowwee feel a whole lot more CONNECT. So popping out a question right off, is it possible to work also under this line and sign The Oath of a Probationer; or do I have to drop the other line. Because really if I have to drop it I am sure it will matter none to them, I just kinda enjoy haveing some of their reading recouses which i am sure you have and much more.

Alittle about me, I am 5 aaaahhh 2. whitey. married 29 years 5 chillins and 9 g-chillins. I will talk about them all at some point because in a very real way they each are a Ritual part of my life. 3 daughters 2 sons- who are both masons like me; though one is wanting to chuck it for some pretty sad reasons, especially since as a career combat soldier with 3 tours of Afghaniland he has contact with lots of masons and I am sure he could get some good PTSD TBI fellowship. The other is so so, but I think my current work is going to bring him Food he has been missing in the dying craft of Missouri---aka misery. Masonicly, this state is all but being lowered into the ground- frankly I think it deserves it. I will discuss my daughters later, my oldest is on her way to witchcraft when she isn't being hung by her toes by her 5 (squared)kids ages 10-3. She just left 2 years ago with her twin sis, as they were both "married" to a man in a fundementalist mormon cult, a hidious protoneandrathal of a brute beast; who thankfully has just been sentanced to 7 years for forcible sexual assault and rape- ( and there are a whole slew of other charges sitting and stewing for the future- I am hoping for not only life in the end- but the entire cult, which lives near Stockton misery, has crimes and evils in it fingernails which I am sure writing them down will look more like some sort of sick novel written by some psychiatrically impaired sexual sociopath. So anyway- I am busy in that dept, and I will discuss more when needed.

I am an excommunicant of the (Moron Church), for "Apostacy and Being a severe threat to the church". I insissted on teaching the doctrines of the founders- not a good thing so they "Freed me", in someways I held on abit, but the nearly 20 years which passed put me through several "Disc Cleanings" "Anti-virus scans" and for the most part a complete rebuilding and new software which made me able to understand experiances in my earliest youth (as well as several live before that >> which former dogma told me does not in anyway exsist and is clearly a satanic spirit deception ad nauseum. I will also say during those years I was "spiritually disturbed" weak in many ways which I woulld think should be easy; although very spiritually blest through instructive dreams, OOBE's Sirit and Angelic manifestation; Life saving intervention- as well as "Cross over to the other side and 'swimming back'" events. With me allowing the "Yoke" of the church in my life for the most part I was barely more than a dumb cattle being led to their slaughter. BTW- the collar on mormon temple garment are called "Yokes of the Priesthood" a very apt term. But thankfully through a near physical death event from a simple surgury and at the same time Another (probably #4 this time) Spiritual Death, I came backi indeed "Born Again" and empowered with the most amazing Gifts Powers and Mental accuity I could never imagine to a living mortal. i remember how so alone I was- like all the other times; but how great the struggle was and full and profound and I wish I could somehow take a slice of my brain tissue and plant it in each of my family's brain- in hopes they would look at me "and finally get it". But then I understand that for them to fully 'get it'; they would have to walk swim drag climb fall etc as I did to get here-- No, could not would not do that to someone I love. But now, I am a happy Warlock; but before i n my life where I was teaching people in priesthood classes 40 years my senior and of High Ranks reaching to the Church's "General Authorities" even had a dream one night, where the next day i told Council of the 70 member by the last name of Hales, he was going to be called as an Apostle of the church and he should really prepare for that. he laughed me away, but his wife was respectful at least. We see where he is now. but I was one talking and teaching machine. Now, happy to sit- shut me yap, and open my eyes ears all my sences, and soak in whatever drop no matter how lowly and discarded like a starving spong with a Black Hole within it. So; if oyu have something to say, there is nothing silly to say to me, say it, it may well be the welcome crumb from a table which will complete the most important feeding I will have.
Well, I hath yammered enough on this topic. Oh, I also love animals. currently have 5 doggies and 2 kitties- usually more., But to me they are deep spiritual and angelic beings in furry suits masquarading as my ever beloved children.
My whole life I have openly annd without shame "Worshipped the severest Thunder and lightening Storms; rejoicing as "My Loving Gods and Goddesses are Singing To Me!" and happy am I to love Lord Baal Hadad.
i love and worship all the gods, ('cept for the judeo xtian muslim ones- I have left them behind as 'slave minor deities) Yes they gave me alot in the way; but the systems which they use as vehicles for the masses can't pprove to be truthful or trusted. All of the "False Gods, "Demons" Devils, many of which are now feigned glory in the blind mad rush of the ignorant under the banner of "Demonology" are actually the best Well Intentioned Self Sacrificial Loving and indeed HOLY- of all the beings Annunaki or otherwise to work upon this globe.

Well, done for now. Blessings Frater, Warlock Dark Matter