College of Thelema: Thelemic Education

I have really found very little in the way of professional research into this idea. Probably because I have been spending too much time learning about ceremonial magick. This was really more of an idea that came to me so it is more of a theory in an infantile manner.

I reckon what really inspired this was something my father said.
He believes that it is natural to think in more black and white terms as we mature. Which i also believe is true.
But through this "maturation", or the individuals socialization, the person becomes conditioned to view reality as being limited what they perceive it to be. The inner child has the ability to see the possibility of something existing beyond its comprehension, while the black/white minded adult's view of reality is condensed to what they "know".

I see everything as having the potential to change. A piece of paper does not take much "convincing" to burst into flames and become something entirely different. Something like a rock takes a lot more "convincing" to get it to change its properties.

I think that part of the repression of this "inner child" is designed to keep us from recognizing the potential for change.

ahh well I do apologize this is not as scientific as it could be. This is a theory that I had an early rejection to but it has stuck around and keeps being fueled by intermittent insights.

But this is all really intriguing when I consider extra-somatic evolution, and how we shape children's brains through the culture by which they are socialized. And I do believe this is closely tied with the Age we find ourselves in.

My opinion.

Love is THE law.

This meaning that ALL action is done out of love. Either love for yourself, or love of others.
Yet every intentional act is an act of will, therefore love is always mastered by will. Yet if there was no love there would be no action.

So, every act is influenced by love, but what we love is determined by what we WILL to love.

one loves by will, one wills by love.

So yes, love is under will. But thats because love is the foundation of the will, that doesnt make inferior.

This is reminding me of talk of the polarity of gender mentioned in the Kybalion. We all know that positive energy couldnt exist without "negative" energy. Male / female Hadit / Nuit all love / all will

I started forming this theory around two years ago, well before learning that this is the Age of Horus.

My theory is that different societies throughout history have deemed certain attitudes, perceptions, ideals etc. as being "childish", in order to maintain a level of authoritative control . I recognize that childhood as we know it now is a relatively recent phenomena. Part of my theory is that in the past the lines between "child" and "adult" were not as clear. Children had to work, and men were still allowed to dream. And over time we have labeled things like "grey thinking" and using the imagination as childish, something one will grow out of. I see this as being a necessary part of the evolution of our species, we may very well never have gotten to the society which we enjoy now if we did not repress those tendencies. I believe our inner child is capable of being completely self involved, which to me explains the (most noticeable) nature our modern society. But I also believe that our "inner child" is capable of being completely selfless. Did this 'inner child' exist in any other terms prior to these tendencies being labeled as childish?

Has anyone else independently come to the conclusion that the "inner child" had been repressed?

I can really see how I have struggled through life with my "inner child" demanding to be recognized. Periods of self involvement countered with periods of extreme empathy. I am thankfully starting to settle somewhere in the middle. Thanks for letting me share. I am hoping this will spark some interesting conversation.

Opposing forces come together to create each other.

I will need to re-read this but on this first glance through I must say I am impressed. Isnt the behaviour of time interesting once you get on a good train of thought? I started down the hermetic path just over a year and a half ago and recently it was like I woke up and realised that over the last year there were maybe a handfull of days that I didnt spend atleast a couple hours reading or making notes. It was like the year was just one busy week lol. What I hadnt realized was just how much i had lost interest in almost every other aspect of intellectual pursuit. It was seriously like stepping out of a dream.

I really appreciate your approach regarding the focus on psyc.. I am a sociology major (currently) and I really enjoy fighting through the "causes" to really get down to what makes certain pepole make cetain decisions. I will curtail my response until I have further familiarized myself with this pattern youre offering. I too have a tendency to think out loud. Thanks for all the work you did, this should prove helpful.

93 W
L

Danke schon

Frater639

"over-analysis might be bordering on obsession"

I agree, I developed a tendency to over analyze pretty much every thing as a teen. I have always rationalized that over-analysis is better that over-simplification. However I would like to make the conjecture that the over-analysis would only be negative if it were not beneficial or was in any way harmful. So based on that I can say that my tendency to over-analyze things is acting as a sort of road block. Which could be taken as positive or negative(ambiguity ugh). Also, while obsession does not nescessarily make a good scientist, it seems that many who we know now were pretty obsessed with what they were doing. I need to learn to do more by doing less do it all by doing nothing...

I definately get the mind-bridle idea. That was one of the first things I noticed, that when i would try to control my mind that it would definately resist.

"Note the observations -- they are "breaks" in your concentration"

And ....I get it, to hold the mind on a singular focus is concentration. Thank you for not backing off, some times things need to be pounded in. I thought I should focus on say the breath or retaining the asana and note observations. So I was essentially looking for things to observe
Question, do you or would you recomend making a note of breaks as they happen? or should they be noted afterword?

@Uni_Verse said

"It could very well me a manifestation of your fear.
"Oh no, do not walk down this path.. you will end up just like them!"
Regardless, it is an issue you need to work through (or you would not have brought it up).
As you will find that either :
(a) that fear did cause the phenomenon, which will stop occurring once you work through the issue
(b) the fear has nothing to do with the phenomenon and there is another underlying issue
(c) it was a solitary occurrence of no real significance

Obviously, this is conjecture and you will not find an answer unless you continue your practices "

I am not quite sure where the fear you mention originated in my post. Unless you are saying that the disturbance was caused by an underlying fear of continuing to take control. I have had a theory for a while now that the thing that was keeping me from lucidly dreaming was a fear that I would not be able to control the things or situations I would create. So every time I would become lucid I would wake up. I am feeling like this may have something to do with accepting that the fact that those horrible things are coming out of my mind, and maybe I really cant control it.

and AB

"If you're still functioning"

HA yes my friend, thank you. I have a pretty normal life also somehow I feel like im the only one of my species somedays... But yes functioning I can happily claim to be. What has happened in the past when I indulge the episode I usually end up being happier than I was and also there is a strong recharge of appreciation for things like family. I usually come back to the Idea that im pretty damn happy were I am and i know all those paths I took that led me through rough times helped make me the person I am now who is a person that believes he can be better. Interesting how saying " I can be better" sounds conceited when actually im only admitting I am not perfect.

damn.... never realised how long winded I am. I am already learning to type faster ...

Yes, that is the only time I have experienced that specific phenomena. I was just worried that it could have been caused or at least spurred on by whatever is causing the "moods".

Or do you mean does this only happen when I am alone?

Agreed, this ship of mine lost a ballast stone.

So, during my most recent meditation session at one point perhaps 10 maybe 15 minutes in I started feeling like my body was just going to stand up with out my telling it to. I will assuredly butcher this experience by trying to convey and understand it. (just so you know i am aware). However it seems to me that this could be another indication that I am not "balanced". It felt as if my body were a vessel that was being overfilled, with an exaggeration of the effect on the (inside of the) front of my body. As if the force were pulling me the way a horse is yoked to a wagon, in the sense that it pushes the wagon. "You" said note the observations, I would not think much of this if It had not been so dramatic. The feeling became quite exaggerated at one point, so much sot that I felt as if i would begin to perspire if I did not give in. I decided to stay the course and continue focusing on my breath and eventually the phenomena subsided. My question is was my body trying to say get the frak up? should I have assumed so and given in? or was I right in just sticking it out. My apologies if these questions are shallow, thanks every one so much for the replies. They have been a god send truly.

I am a cancer and I know that my (maternal)grand father had manic episodes and mother has dyslexia and has suffered for a long time with emotional problems. I bring that up because I feel that my subconscious emotional state is getting stirred up, and I know it has got to be causing some imbalance. I have had trauma throughout life but I have but have always been able to roll with it with an appropriate amount of pain. I think some of the things from my past (behaviors, habits, experiences etc.) are causing some kind of imbalance. But is this not part of the great work? To purify the different aspects of our consciousness? Thanks again every one.

WILL
LOVE

I am looking for the metaphysical sign post but I cant "see the trees for the wood" as it were. I definately agree that the theorizing is doing little but distracting from the real work. I felt I needed to build a broad base before diving in, but I got to the point were I wanted to start practicing and found myself reluctant. I would compare it to rock climbing, when a person doesn't ubnderstand the belay device and how to tie proper knots they are reluctant. Lol I taught myself to belay and tie all the knots I know, but it wasn't until I understood how they operated that I felt comfortable putting it into action. At some point I theorized ( oh boy here we go again) that the rituals and God names etc. where merely conventions by which we access areas of our subconscious mind. So I figured hell be damned and started in on some practice.

" usual kind consists of odd sentences, or fragments of sentences, which are quite distinctly heard in a recognisable human voice"

I do not imagine that I should be having this "break" so i would say the things I am "hearing" are not actually hallucinations. could be (and have been) wrong

So I have noticed that there is a difference between what I would term my "inner narration" and the "voice of my mind" for lack of better termenology. In short, the narration is always in context with what I am experiencing (which is the mind's voice). Now i know this because I listen to it (the mind voice) and the things it says are totally random. These thoughts I know are not arising from my subconcious (but could it be the universal-concious?) because they have no bearing on my situation, or even broader my entire life. For example (not an actual instance) while meditating i have the concious line of thought ( I feel, I hear, I smell.. etc.) interupted by thoughts such as " bob just got back from the pharmacy". I dont know a BOB, and i was not at the pharmacy nor do I need to go. Anyone else experience any thing like this? Could it be my mind taking the myriad of sensory input I have sucked up and mixing it all together and spitting back out something seeminlgy unrecognisible? Or could it be that I am picking up the thoughts of people living their lives unaware that they are shooting these little thoughts out as they take bob to the pharmacy? And in the case of the latter is there any ehtical responsibility to not hear these thoughts that are not mine?

I think I will put my electronic brain down and do A bit now.

Thank you. Frater 639

I'm not quite sure how I typed lbrh, cause I have only done the lbrp, that's some typo considering the keys are rows apart. Made it only. 30 Mins. Today. My feet were totally numb after that period. I just observed the thoughts that pop up. I have a habit of narrating what I am experiencing to my self as I am experiencing it. At one point (during this exercise) I tried to kill that thought because I felt like it had some sort of negative effect. I am very appreciative, so thanks are in order. I am starting Raja Yoga so ill let youknow where that takes me.

Gotta learn to walk before we can run.

Roger that.

So I assume I should spend some time training the mind before trying any astral travel? I am very interested in the astral plane. I keep getting ahead of myself, thats why I started tarring the AA curriculum, to give some order. But honestly it has discouraged me. I have to keep reminding myself that I need to take my time. But being confused as to where to start has made me wary of spending much time doing anything specific. I am going to start the hour long exercise today and try to do it every day for a week. Thanks again, a little encouragement has helped a lot.

It seems like it would be helpful for me to make a set time daily to do the hour long exercise. Should I even bother with acknowledging the specific hour of the day? Or doing the lbrp for that matter?

Keeping track of them over time is definately revealing. I wouldnt have thought much of any of those things alone but together over time they add to.. well the make up something worth adding to.

OK so take up asana and try to stay physically still. What should I occupy my mind with? Resisting the urge to scratch, ,move etc.?

This is really my first time sharing with anyone. I have had no one to show me tests they did early on etc.. My area does have some GD members near by but I have been reluctant to make personal contact. Should I take the opportunity presenting itself, because I do feel that I would benefit some structure to my study. now I know only I can decide if it is right for me, but it is the structure I want not necessarily that order. another question for another area of the forum. Ill take it there. Thanks Avshalom, I ahve read quite a bit but am really having a hard time getting started with some practical work.

I had a similar experience during the summer of 11'. I was becoming extremely fed up with some people i was working with at our local dominoes. It was like being in a room full of people that really had no idea (or didnt care) that their world was not the entire world. I watched the Baba Ram Dass documentary called "stroked by Grace" and i was able to see that me being in the position to have to deal with these people was "god" giving me an opportunity to grow. I had to learn to realize that god was acting through those people to help bring me to a better place.

This makes me think of an idea i had recently. On my drive to work I drive through the medical district of our city which happens to be across the the highway from the projects, the northern side of our inner city is really pretty rough. Any who, almost everyday i see a homeless person at this intersection and i believe it is only natural to have an emotional (not overly emotional) reaction to seeing a person who needs help. And i cant help but to flash back to what my father did for me as a child (4th grade), he found out i wasnt making good grades do he made me dig a ditch in the back yard at night in the rain (lol). The next day he took me out of school and took me to work with him around the city, and spent the whole day pointing out homeless people and asking me if I wanted to grow up to be a bum like them. So needless to say for most of my adolescence i really judged homeless people because i figured that they F*ed their life up why feel sorry for them? Well i see things a little differently now, i see more of god in the homeless man than I see in the successful man in his mercedes. So i ask you (collective) what do you see when you look at a homeless person?

Love is the Law Love under Will

I became aware early on in my search (im still in early stages) that the role of the initial grades of initiation (I believe this may be GD but could also be thelemic, im sure some one will know) are working with the elemental aspects within the initiate. So I thought that would be a good place to start. I chose an asana (dragon) based on a random "vision" i had during sex of a very "Chinese" black colored dragon ( i thought maybe I AM THE DRAGON... haha). Learned the LBRH and decided I would do that ritual and then assume the asana and meditate for an undecided amount of time.

Initially I felt some what awkward performing the ritual. Knowing that I was making mistakes really inhibited me from "being in the moment" as it were. I decided to leave off the ritual until I had the will to do it correctly.( just a matter of applying ones self)

Ok questions, #1. Should I be focused on transmuting these aspects of my "atman"(?) or should I focus more on samadhi? which I was under the impression that samadhi was the "union of the object and the observer".

#2. I was "meditating" and focusing on an object and at one point it felt as if I had more than one point of view and i simultaneously saw the object and saw myself from the point of view of the object. Is this something i should take as encouragement or write off? LAter on I was still focusing on annihilating the impression of duality. During a later meditation I was inspired to realize that my physical body was the object and "I" (not the fingers on the keys) was the observer. Comments?

#3. I recently decided to write a little prose,(posted at bottom) I write only occasionally. I wrote a short piece over a couple days and felt quite good about it. It was nothing particularly enthralling but it clicked in my mind. The poem became a sort of mantra that I repeat whenever I notice my mind slipping into idle thought.

Then one day I decided to meditate on the planetary aspect of the hour of day in which i would be meditating. The hour was 10:00 am on Fri. and i found the (correct?) attribution to Venus. So I constructed a sigil of what I found to be the Symbols for Anael and of Venus. During this specific mediation I was inspired to look at the womb mentioned in the poem as death. But not necessarily physical death, but rather the "dying" of something in order in order for it to be reborn. And in a subsequent meditation i envisioned myself by a stream with some one, it felt as if anael were with me and communicating to me non verbally that the water (the water of earth, venus?) exist to wash away the impurities of my inner self. Not unlike the whole bathed in the blood of Jesus deal. ( wheres the question you might say)
Before writing the prose I had been inspired to start making the Water sign of Auramoth when my hands were idle, later I learned that you become the glyph when making this symbol.
My question is should I entertain the idea that through my mediocre daily observances I was actually allowed this experience? Or should I remain skeptical and assume that because I want to see the connections i may be subconsciously drawing them were none exist?

Eternity rests upon the lips of every moment
I put a finger to mine own
Silence!
unlock the door so I may enter
the palace whose name is written in no tome

Along the darkened path I shall cease to wonder
for by the light of the eternal lantern I have seen the way
Silence!
her secret name, the keeper of the ember
the laccus which harbors the living flame

Eternity rests upon the lips of every moment
I put a finger to mine own
Silence!
I shall tear the door asunder
for of these mysteries are made a womb

A littleness more info.
I guess first off I would like to say I am very excited. I was spawned here on earth in the beautiful state of Alabama, near the TN border. Unfourtunately our area is not exactly thriving with people (actively) seeking a higher level of conciosness. And I see now (literally just realising this) that must have been part of the sequence of events that led to this individual moment.
I am experiencing an overwhelming sensation, extremely optimistic, however with no regards to any specifif matter. It is as is the fact that we are all gathered here, and wanting to help each other, is already acting on my subconscious mind. Hahaha

So introductions usually go both ways, I would be happy to look through them (all??yea....)
but I would appreciate y'all telling me somethign about yourselves. Unless the more natural path is to make the acquaintances as you go.

Love under Wil